As I look at the scenery outside, the day getting darker and heavy rain beginning to fall, still half way to the airport, I think of J. Caught myself wondering what she would be babbling about if she was with me. How long till I can think of her the same way I think about Ana, my ex-wife? Or, in other words, how long till I know in my heart that I'm over her? It's been only a few months but feels like I have been alone for so long. How come this feeling is so strong and the memory of her does not get weaker? Just the arguments, fights, problems and bad things seem to be slowly fading. And this is what forces me to keep constant watch, reminding myself how much I suffered because of her, either directly or indirectly.