The day started fairly early yesterday. Not too early because it's not day until around ten o'clock in the morning anyway, but we were all very active already when the sun finally decided to show his face.
When I say 'we', I mean Sergey, Lubov and myself. Yulia and Alina usually are up at 7:30 because school starts at 8:00.
Sergey asked me (Oh, yeah! We can communicate even though he does not speak English) if I wanted to follow him while he prepared a mounting support for the Xmas Tree he intended to buy. I followed.
We went to a small garage, converted into a storage room, where his father keeps tools like saws and welding machines. Once there I helped (not too much, I'm afraid) measuring and sawing three metal bars he intended to weld to a cylinder he found. The cylinder was hallow and would be great to out the trunk of the tree in. The bars, once welded should keep the cylinder upright. Sawing the bars ended up being more work than he expected so he decided to have someone else do the welding.
We went to Slava's Car Repair Shop. I was very much surprised to see such a big modern shop in a small town like Tchaikovsky. Slave proudly shows pictures of the work done at his shop. Cars that had turned over we repaired to the smallest details. The painting job was incredibly good. He even has a computer to mix Pantone colours to mach specific colours from specific brands and years of cars. Quite amazing, really.
While his employees worked on the welding of our Xmas Tree Base, we talked. I realized that the more I hear the language the easier it becomes to pick up words or even entire conversations, though I do not speak.
For example, Slava asked Sergey if he could speak English and Sergey said no. Then he asked how do you talk to each other then? Sergey explained we managed and mentioned he was very surprised to see I could read Russian. Well, it's not like I can get a book and devour it in a couple of hours but I have been here for three days and I am picking up the language. Let's say I have the reading skills of a 7-year-old. I stumble into difficult words, stress the wrong syllable but I am reading. Slava, then, told Sergey about a guy he met in France. The guy could not speak any French at first but not long time later he was able to find his way around. He mentioned, wisely I would say, that this happens when you speak more than a language. Things start making more sense. It is true. So many words in Russian are similar to their English, Portuguese, Spanish or whatever.
For example, shops are 'magazines'. In English a magazine is a totally different thing but in Portuguese (old Portuguese, anyway) it is a place where you can buy goods.
I was surprised I could understand the entire conversation. By the time I live Russia I will be speaking at least a bit. Won't that be cool?
With the welding of the tree base done, we went to buy the tree itself. Unfortunately all places we tried were closed. You see, their Xmas Trees are real, not plastic ones. So we had to go to the periphery of Tchaikovsky to buy the tree. A very rural area, with small farms. The farmers don't really sit there waiting for customers. They have better things to do, I figure. As a result, we got home with no Xmas Tree.
Yulia and Alina were waiting for us for lunch, poor girls. It was already past 3 in the afternoon when we arrived. After lunch, Sergey and Alina went out to find a tree. Yulia and I stayed behind. Mom was at the 'magazine'... Well... It was a wonderful afternoon.
When Sergey returned, shortly after Mom called to say she was on her way home (may God bless this woman; gotta love her!).
When he arrived he had this big, natural Xmas tree he went into the woods to get. Alina mentioned they were knee deep in snow and that it had been fun. To that Yulia whispered in English so they could not understand even if they had heard "we had fun too"... She's just too cute!
When Mom arrived we put the Xmas Tree on its base and started decorating it. It was he first time in my life I did that. First time also I really put presents under the tree. I was very happy.
Little did I know things would not be so nice later in the evening.
We went for dinner with Igor, Yulia's cousin, and Olga, his girlfriend. Very nice folks that I met before. I wanted to go some place nice but Tchaikovsky is too small and the options are limited. We ended up in the Butterfly Cafe, again, where Yulia had her usual ice-cream and I had, just for lack of option, an instant coffee.
I took the opportunity to call my parents and wish them a Merry Xmas. Yulia was a bit embarrassed to talk to them. Even to talk to my cousin, Soraya, who happens to speak a little Russian, being married to a Russian man. I was a bit disappointed but it was ok. I understand him being shy and all.
What happened was, we left the Butterfly Cafe and went to a restaurant. There, for the first time I was sad with Yulia.
I usually say that "What I do not know, the Devil will whisper in my ears". I can't explain why - maybe I am just too susceptible to signs - but I can sense things. And suddenly I sensed Yulia was talking about me to Igor and Olga.
She does all the time, I know, but this was different. It was not regular conversation, small talk or anything alike. How can I explain it? Let's put it like this: if I was recording all the conversation she had with people about me, that specific bit would be the one she would be embarrassed to have translated. Do you get the idea? That was the very first time she was using the language barrier against me. Specifically happy I could not understand what she was saying.
Well, we talked and she swore I was wrong. She explained she was actually complaining about her mom and since she was not using 'nice' words, her body language might have led me to believe she was trying to hide from me. Which she was, but not what l thought. I'm willing to give her the benefit of doubt. Besides, between us, true or not her explanation was quite convincing.
All's well when it ends well.
Thursday 25 December 2003
Wednesday 24 December 2003
Un altro giorno se ne va
What a beautiful day yesterday was. Yulia came home early from school and we had a chance to spend more time together. After lunch, Alina, her sister went out with friends and Mom went to her shop (she has a store and sells high quality winter and leather clothes). Left alone, we had some time for ourselves. We packed Xmas presents, talked a lot and even misbehaved a bit. Just a bit! Needless to say my insecurities were all washed away.
Later in the afternoon, after Mom called to check if everything was alright, we went out. My Baby Girl became very sad she had to remove the piercing she did in her belly button. The one they gave her was too heavy and the skin was inflamed and getting thinner. If she did not remove it, it would probably break. That would be a pity because she has one of those cute belly buttons.
Later in the afternoon, after Mom called to check if everything was alright, we went out. My Baby Girl became very sad she had to remove the piercing she did in her belly button. The one they gave her was too heavy and the skin was inflamed and getting thinner. If she did not remove it, it would probably break. That would be a pity because she has one of those cute belly buttons.
Monday 22 December 2003
The end of the second day
I was right... She is indeed sorting her own feelings, trying to gather information, analysing bits and pieces to decide: Do I want to marry this guy?
She won't let me in on her thoughts, of course, but when I look into her eyes I can almost see the table of judges raising their white signs with my score every time I do something. So far the crowd did not 'boo' me off the stage. I can say the total accumulated score is good by her actions but unfortunately that is no guarantee of a happy ending. As the saying goes, "It's not over until the fat lady sings".
She is always sweet and caring. Makes it hard not to make comparisons. For example, before we leave the house to the cold snow covered streets, she will lovingly help me with my scarf, making sure my neck is covered and protected from the cold. She holds my hand when the ground is slippery and my arm whenever we are going up or down a set of stairs, not because she's afraid she'll fall but because she's afraid I will. She also gives me 'room to breathe', not clinging too much all the time though I would not mind if she did.
Her folks are also very kind and though I'm sure they have an eye on us, they are extremely discreet and never unpleasant. I just know they have their concerns because I would, too. But I think they like me and I'm even learning some Russian to talk to them.
No matter what happens, this is one experience to cherish.
She won't let me in on her thoughts, of course, but when I look into her eyes I can almost see the table of judges raising their white signs with my score every time I do something. So far the crowd did not 'boo' me off the stage. I can say the total accumulated score is good by her actions but unfortunately that is no guarantee of a happy ending. As the saying goes, "It's not over until the fat lady sings".
She is always sweet and caring. Makes it hard not to make comparisons. For example, before we leave the house to the cold snow covered streets, she will lovingly help me with my scarf, making sure my neck is covered and protected from the cold. She holds my hand when the ground is slippery and my arm whenever we are going up or down a set of stairs, not because she's afraid she'll fall but because she's afraid I will. She also gives me 'room to breathe', not clinging too much all the time though I would not mind if she did.
Her folks are also very kind and though I'm sure they have an eye on us, they are extremely discreet and never unpleasant. I just know they have their concerns because I would, too. But I think they like me and I'm even learning some Russian to talk to them.
No matter what happens, this is one experience to cherish.
Sunday 21 December 2003
When insecurity sets in
Of course it had to happen sometime. The first day was almost perfect. Nothing much happened apart from a quick stroll through the town centre, some hand-in-hand walk by frozen Kama River, bad coffee in a small cafe near Mom's shop and a stop to watch 'Kill Bill', Tarantino's latest movie.
Everything fine. Well, actually I will have to watch the movie again some other time. No, no, no... I was not being naughty at the cinema, no. That is not the reason I have to watch the movie again. I have to watch it again because we did not know the movie was dubbed in Russian with no subtitles whatsoever. What do you do then? As I watched, people around me laughed and 'wowed' to the clever dialogs and action scenes. I did not mind the movie too much, startled by Yulia's smile and soft skin. Erm... Never mind.
Something happened, though. After we got back home to meet Mom, Dad and Sis for dinner out, my Baby Girl became very quiet. I don't know if she was sad, pissed with something or what. Maybe she was tired, having to speak in English all the time and translating the dialogues back and forth, English to Russian, Russian to English as I happily talked with her parents. I asked if anything was wrong. She said no but would not elaborate.
Of course I thought I had done something or said something, either to her or to her family and she got upset. I must be really sick or have a very low self steam... Or maybe I think the world revolves around me. I don't know. I noticed I always tend to think it's my fault. Anyway...
I had the impression she grew a bit distant. Of course I cannot expect her to be available all the time or even smiling all the time but it occurred to me that maybe was evaluating our first day together. That's when insecurity comes into play. Was I good enough?
You don't get a second chance to make a first impression, you know. I truly believe her folks liked me but... Did she?
Everything fine. Well, actually I will have to watch the movie again some other time. No, no, no... I was not being naughty at the cinema, no. That is not the reason I have to watch the movie again. I have to watch it again because we did not know the movie was dubbed in Russian with no subtitles whatsoever. What do you do then? As I watched, people around me laughed and 'wowed' to the clever dialogs and action scenes. I did not mind the movie too much, startled by Yulia's smile and soft skin. Erm... Never mind.
Something happened, though. After we got back home to meet Mom, Dad and Sis for dinner out, my Baby Girl became very quiet. I don't know if she was sad, pissed with something or what. Maybe she was tired, having to speak in English all the time and translating the dialogues back and forth, English to Russian, Russian to English as I happily talked with her parents. I asked if anything was wrong. She said no but would not elaborate.
Of course I thought I had done something or said something, either to her or to her family and she got upset. I must be really sick or have a very low self steam... Or maybe I think the world revolves around me. I don't know. I noticed I always tend to think it's my fault. Anyway...
I had the impression she grew a bit distant. Of course I cannot expect her to be available all the time or even smiling all the time but it occurred to me that maybe was evaluating our first day together. That's when insecurity comes into play. Was I good enough?
You don't get a second chance to make a first impression, you know. I truly believe her folks liked me but... Did she?
Saturday 20 December 2003
The first Day
It's very early in the morning here. I guess it should be almost noon back at home. Despite the fact I went to bed very late, I'm already awake, my mind racing, recollecting recent events. Ladies and gentleman of the jury, she is the most adorable thing in the world. I can't explain the magical aura that surrounds her being. And though I know she is only human, right now I just don't seem to recognise her possible flaws. I am happy and warm with her in my life...
But I am getting ahead of myself. Do forgive me for this unavailable state of awe. I am in Russia. One place in the world I did not quite though I would see. I begin my travel last Friday at 10:00pm. I flew from Singapore to Bangkok, Bangkok to Istanbul, Istanbul to Moscow, Moscow to Izhevsk, rode a car from Izhevsk to a small town called Chaikovsky, more than 14,000 kilometres from my point of origin, just to meet her... The one girl who has been giving me hopes of a happy life again: Yulia, my precious Russian princess.
And she is more than I could have hoped for. It is no wonder her kindness and beauty show so clearly in her emails, SMSs and pictures; she seems to be love personified. As a friend said: a goddess. She is indeed. And if this goddess in tiny form accepts me, in exchange for daily doses of her love, I'll be her servant, making her the one and only in my life.
But I am getting ahead of myself. Do forgive me for this unavailable state of awe. I am in Russia. One place in the world I did not quite though I would see. I begin my travel last Friday at 10:00pm. I flew from Singapore to Bangkok, Bangkok to Istanbul, Istanbul to Moscow, Moscow to Izhevsk, rode a car from Izhevsk to a small town called Chaikovsky, more than 14,000 kilometres from my point of origin, just to meet her... The one girl who has been giving me hopes of a happy life again: Yulia, my precious Russian princess.
And she is more than I could have hoped for. It is no wonder her kindness and beauty show so clearly in her emails, SMSs and pictures; she seems to be love personified. As a friend said: a goddess. She is indeed. And if this goddess in tiny form accepts me, in exchange for daily doses of her love, I'll be her servant, making her the one and only in my life.
Sunday 23 November 2003
A Brief Update
Yep. It's that time again. Time to put things in writing after a long period. A lot happened but unfortunately I could not write sooner. As it seems to be most of the time, I am having this 'writing' break at the airport.
I'm going to Manila again for another round of fun. Well, this is said with some sarcasm I must admit but it would be unfair to say I did not have fun. Work was had for three weeks and during those days, my last visit, when my alleged 'discovery session' became a project in the blink of an eye, I barely had time for myself.
I was working over 12 hours a day. Some days almost 16. Take that out of a 24 hour day and you'll notice time left for sleeping or having fun isn't much.
But as I said, it would be unfair to say I didn't have fun. I was very lucky to be working with a good friend from a previous project. His good moods, funny ways and light-hearted approach to problems helped a lot in maintaining my faith in the project and in myself.
The fact he's a great programmer also helped, of course. Most of the integration effort was pushed to the Agent's Desktop Application, which he developed from scratch in record time. I never saw this before, honestly. And I've been with the company for quite a while now. I wish it was that simple to integrate with Siebel or Onyx (Oooh, talking about Onyx reminds me of RHB - Malaysia... Lets change subject quick!).
The pressure of the work was nevertheless enormous. My good friend and I were bombarded with requests and problems to solve. Things got better when Super Itty Bitty came to rescue, send by the Almighty Powers of Paul.
I was proud that I had everything installed and working before Itty Bitty actually got on site. But of course, he had valuable information and configuration to make things work better, explaining to e, my friend and the end customer the ‘what’s, ‘why’s and ‘when’s of everything. Boy, he's good!
Yulia's messages also helped keeping me sane. She's just adorable. Gotta love the girl, honestly. Things are going pretty ok and the plans of spending Xmas and New Year with her are still valid. As soon as I return from this trip, I should have my VISA to Russia and my flight schedule ready.
She's very excited and so am I. Of course doubts still haunt us both. Will she like me? Will I like her? Can we really get married and live happily ever after?
Statistics say these internet relationships last 6 months. It would be a pity if that was the case. I hope w do not end up as statistics.
Some good friends are really glad we are together. They can see how happy I am and they are happy for me. Others are worried, they care about me and know this is risky business. I know that. But living is risky business, isn't it? The only way you can be really safe is by dying. After that nothing matters anymore. But until that day, a day that is going to come to all of us, isn't it safe - pun intended - to say we're unsafe?
C'mon, think about it. You can hide in a farm, away from traffic, crime, modern age diseases and still die by tripping on a rock or due to a sudden thunder storm. Silly? Funny? Maybe, yes. But true, notwithstanding!
We all heard story of people who survived car crashes and died chocking on a piece of meat or slipping on a banana peel.
If life is so unsafe and death is the ultimate risk what have I to loose to put my cards on this unusual relationship? I risk a broken heart. Yes... I know... But I had many already. By know I can tell you from experience: it hurts but it will heal with time.
I'm going to Manila again for another round of fun. Well, this is said with some sarcasm I must admit but it would be unfair to say I did not have fun. Work was had for three weeks and during those days, my last visit, when my alleged 'discovery session' became a project in the blink of an eye, I barely had time for myself.
I was working over 12 hours a day. Some days almost 16. Take that out of a 24 hour day and you'll notice time left for sleeping or having fun isn't much.
But as I said, it would be unfair to say I didn't have fun. I was very lucky to be working with a good friend from a previous project. His good moods, funny ways and light-hearted approach to problems helped a lot in maintaining my faith in the project and in myself.
The fact he's a great programmer also helped, of course. Most of the integration effort was pushed to the Agent's Desktop Application, which he developed from scratch in record time. I never saw this before, honestly. And I've been with the company for quite a while now. I wish it was that simple to integrate with Siebel or Onyx (Oooh, talking about Onyx reminds me of RHB - Malaysia... Lets change subject quick!).
The pressure of the work was nevertheless enormous. My good friend and I were bombarded with requests and problems to solve. Things got better when Super Itty Bitty came to rescue, send by the Almighty Powers of Paul.
I was proud that I had everything installed and working before Itty Bitty actually got on site. But of course, he had valuable information and configuration to make things work better, explaining to e, my friend and the end customer the ‘what’s, ‘why’s and ‘when’s of everything. Boy, he's good!
Yulia's messages also helped keeping me sane. She's just adorable. Gotta love the girl, honestly. Things are going pretty ok and the plans of spending Xmas and New Year with her are still valid. As soon as I return from this trip, I should have my VISA to Russia and my flight schedule ready.
She's very excited and so am I. Of course doubts still haunt us both. Will she like me? Will I like her? Can we really get married and live happily ever after?
Statistics say these internet relationships last 6 months. It would be a pity if that was the case. I hope w do not end up as statistics.
Some good friends are really glad we are together. They can see how happy I am and they are happy for me. Others are worried, they care about me and know this is risky business. I know that. But living is risky business, isn't it? The only way you can be really safe is by dying. After that nothing matters anymore. But until that day, a day that is going to come to all of us, isn't it safe - pun intended - to say we're unsafe?
C'mon, think about it. You can hide in a farm, away from traffic, crime, modern age diseases and still die by tripping on a rock or due to a sudden thunder storm. Silly? Funny? Maybe, yes. But true, notwithstanding!
We all heard story of people who survived car crashes and died chocking on a piece of meat or slipping on a banana peel.
If life is so unsafe and death is the ultimate risk what have I to loose to put my cards on this unusual relationship? I risk a broken heart. Yes... I know... But I had many already. By know I can tell you from experience: it hurts but it will heal with time.
Sunday 12 October 2003
The Matchbox definition
“[...] But I'm not crazy; I'm just a little unwell
I know right now you can't tell
But stay a while and maybe then you'll see
A different side of me
I'm not crazy, I'm just a little impaired
I know right now you don't care
But soon enough you're gonna think of me
And how I used to be [...]”
I know right now you can't tell
But stay a while and maybe then you'll see
A different side of me
I'm not crazy, I'm just a little impaired
I know right now you don't care
But soon enough you're gonna think of me
And how I used to be [...]”
Wednesday 8 October 2003
From Russia, with love
I can't stop thinking of my Sweet Russian Girlfriend. She's already part of my life. I'm so infatuated I am surprised. We exchange messages everyday, several times a day, either via SMS or email. And we are so connected that if I think of her, a couple of minutes later she will write me and vice-versa.
It's pretty much what J and I used to have, the difference being whenever I had the feeling J was thinking of me she would usually be doing something wrong...
Yulia also seems to 'feel' when something is bothering me. When she does, she's got such a nice non-intrusive way of asking me what the problem is that her being so tactful makes me smile. She's adorable.
We're talking marriage already. The plan is to meet end of this year or begin of next year, spend sometime together to assess marriage is the right thing to do and if so, get married in June.
I mentioned the plans to my sister and she got a bit concerned... "Don't you think it's too soon? You barely know her!!!" Yeah, of course it is soon but does is really matter? Sometimes you spend years with someone just to find out you never really knew that person. What's the difference?
It's pretty much what J and I used to have, the difference being whenever I had the feeling J was thinking of me she would usually be doing something wrong...
Yulia also seems to 'feel' when something is bothering me. When she does, she's got such a nice non-intrusive way of asking me what the problem is that her being so tactful makes me smile. She's adorable.
We're talking marriage already. The plan is to meet end of this year or begin of next year, spend sometime together to assess marriage is the right thing to do and if so, get married in June.
I mentioned the plans to my sister and she got a bit concerned... "Don't you think it's too soon? You barely know her!!!" Yeah, of course it is soon but does is really matter? Sometimes you spend years with someone just to find out you never really knew that person. What's the difference?
Sunday 5 October 2003
OIC, BBQ, BKK & GVP
Back from Malaysia, on the way to Bangkok. Turns out my visit to KL wasn't so bad after all. The customer is still clueless and things are still delayed - much to the end user annoyance - but at least our part is safe. Some damage control was all we needed, even though there was no problem in the first place. It took us, BK and I, exact 10 minutes on the server room to put things to work. All we did was start the software and - Voila - all worked. A couple of meetings with the chickens and we were out of there. Well, BK and WT were; I stayed for another day as requested by the end user.
I managed to get back home before the OIC meeting really started. Trust me, unless you are a Muslim Official, you don't want to be there. Do not get me wrong, it has nothing to do with the religion. It's just that traffic jams are the rule rather than the exception and with all the preparations for the summit, the problem just gets worse.
So I got back home on Friday afternoon, on time to do some grocery shopping for the Saturday BBQ. I'm getting older, you see. Tomorrow I'll be turning 36. Joseph, my landlord and friend was very kind to suggest lunch at his place in celebration to my birthday. But after giving it some thought I decided to spare him the trouble and prepare a BBQ at home instead. It was quite good I'd say, though I was a bit concerned about BK. He's vegetarian and apart from the salad there wasn't much for him to eat.
I rested all day on Sunday, organising my DVD collection and chatting to Yulia over SMS. Oh, she is really adorable. I think this is it: she's the one. She already has me so infatuated that J became someone from the past. Yes, she's that good.
Of course J still shows up now and then but if at first I'd keep thinking about her, why it didn't work between us and if it would be any different should we give it another try, now I find myself annoyed by her persistent attempts to try again. Her sweetness sounds fake and I can feel her desperate to act understanding and changed. Somewhat pitiful, I would say.
The relationship with Yulia, on the other hand, just keeps getting better. Well, if you can call this a relationship, that is. I mean, she's still there on the other side of the world. But we are making plans. And I am glad to announce my plans to get married next year might become a reality.
We are talking about June. Sounds far but time flies. I will have a couple of months to save some money for flight tickets and marriage expenses (the income tax and the operation exhausted my funds). I should travel to Russia end of the year, spend Xmas and New Year with her, come back, save some more money, bring her over to spend a month and then return for the marriage. After that we can go to Brazil and I will introduce her to my family. Good Lah!!!
She has given me new strength to fight the good fight, you know? I feel more motivated. I can feel things getting better. Even the illness did not put me down. It's all about attitude, I know. But that is exactly my point. She makes me face life with better attitude and that makes everything else better.
Even the travels are starting again. After a period of inactivity, I was beginning to get bored. But now I am getting busy again. I was in Malaysia last week, this week I am going to Thailand and next week I am probably flying to the Philippines. And I am loving it!
Last week was only troubleshooting at RHB. This week I will be 'shadowing' Simon, a consultant from Australia who is coming to Bangkok to install GVP to Samart. I am just tagging along as this is going to be my first contact with the tool. Then, my return to the Philippines after a loooong time is for a brief POC for a local contact centre outsourcer. Nothing special, just a blended OCS environment. That will put my knowledge to proof.
It's going to be a busy month, I am sure. But again, that is good. Time flies when you are having fun.
I managed to get back home before the OIC meeting really started. Trust me, unless you are a Muslim Official, you don't want to be there. Do not get me wrong, it has nothing to do with the religion. It's just that traffic jams are the rule rather than the exception and with all the preparations for the summit, the problem just gets worse.
So I got back home on Friday afternoon, on time to do some grocery shopping for the Saturday BBQ. I'm getting older, you see. Tomorrow I'll be turning 36. Joseph, my landlord and friend was very kind to suggest lunch at his place in celebration to my birthday. But after giving it some thought I decided to spare him the trouble and prepare a BBQ at home instead. It was quite good I'd say, though I was a bit concerned about BK. He's vegetarian and apart from the salad there wasn't much for him to eat.
I rested all day on Sunday, organising my DVD collection and chatting to Yulia over SMS. Oh, she is really adorable. I think this is it: she's the one. She already has me so infatuated that J became someone from the past. Yes, she's that good.
Of course J still shows up now and then but if at first I'd keep thinking about her, why it didn't work between us and if it would be any different should we give it another try, now I find myself annoyed by her persistent attempts to try again. Her sweetness sounds fake and I can feel her desperate to act understanding and changed. Somewhat pitiful, I would say.
The relationship with Yulia, on the other hand, just keeps getting better. Well, if you can call this a relationship, that is. I mean, she's still there on the other side of the world. But we are making plans. And I am glad to announce my plans to get married next year might become a reality.
We are talking about June. Sounds far but time flies. I will have a couple of months to save some money for flight tickets and marriage expenses (the income tax and the operation exhausted my funds). I should travel to Russia end of the year, spend Xmas and New Year with her, come back, save some more money, bring her over to spend a month and then return for the marriage. After that we can go to Brazil and I will introduce her to my family. Good Lah!!!
She has given me new strength to fight the good fight, you know? I feel more motivated. I can feel things getting better. Even the illness did not put me down. It's all about attitude, I know. But that is exactly my point. She makes me face life with better attitude and that makes everything else better.
Even the travels are starting again. After a period of inactivity, I was beginning to get bored. But now I am getting busy again. I was in Malaysia last week, this week I am going to Thailand and next week I am probably flying to the Philippines. And I am loving it!
Last week was only troubleshooting at RHB. This week I will be 'shadowing' Simon, a consultant from Australia who is coming to Bangkok to install GVP to Samart. I am just tagging along as this is going to be my first contact with the tool. Then, my return to the Philippines after a loooong time is for a brief POC for a local contact centre outsourcer. Nothing special, just a blended OCS environment. That will put my knowledge to proof.
It's going to be a busy month, I am sure. But again, that is good. Time flies when you are having fun.
Tuesday 30 September 2003
Preparing for battle
So... Today I have this 'finger pointing' session to attend to. Not unusual, unfortunately. The only thing that bothers me is that there would be no problem if I didn't happen to fall sick. In my absence, the development team from the project had a question, I wasn't available to answer, the message was forwarded to my 'colleague' who did not really bother to understand the background of the project before brusquely saying the software version was defective and they should upgrade and telling my supporters on site they were 'incompetent' to perform the tasks I assigned them.
Now, let me put it like this: The guys dealing with the development team have not been trained but they have been doing hands on for some time and compared to the others working in the project they are the most knowledgeable folks we have available. They are my eyes and hands when I am not around. Telling them they are incompetent is definitely an approach we should avoid.
As a result, I had to do some damage control when they said “if we are incompetent, we won't touch the servers anymore - you come and fix your own stuff”. Great, isn't it? That did not help me any.
The other problem was, prior to beginning this project, the customer asked us if they would have to upgrade the software version. There would be no extra charge for that BUT there would be a different approach on implementing the solution and that meant more money for the development team. They did not have the budget so we all agreed we would stick to the version they had. Functionality would be limited but sufficient to attend to their expected features.
When my fellow co-worker said the software was “buggy”, could not provide the features they wanted and they should upgrade (he went as far as to sending them the new version) he created a 'trust' problem. The end user started questioning if we actually knew what we were talking about when we suggested they retained their software version. Worst, they started asking if they should believe us when we said the new version, soon to be implemented in a new project, was compatible. They feared they would make the change and later on they would be informed that “the version they were using was buggy too”.
Do you see the problem? I am not sure if I am making myself understood but I can tell you it was messy. Those were the reasons for our 'finger pointing' session today. But everything will be fine, I know. All's well when it ends well and the damage control has been done.
Now, let me put it like this: The guys dealing with the development team have not been trained but they have been doing hands on for some time and compared to the others working in the project they are the most knowledgeable folks we have available. They are my eyes and hands when I am not around. Telling them they are incompetent is definitely an approach we should avoid.
As a result, I had to do some damage control when they said “if we are incompetent, we won't touch the servers anymore - you come and fix your own stuff”. Great, isn't it? That did not help me any.
The other problem was, prior to beginning this project, the customer asked us if they would have to upgrade the software version. There would be no extra charge for that BUT there would be a different approach on implementing the solution and that meant more money for the development team. They did not have the budget so we all agreed we would stick to the version they had. Functionality would be limited but sufficient to attend to their expected features.
When my fellow co-worker said the software was “buggy”, could not provide the features they wanted and they should upgrade (he went as far as to sending them the new version) he created a 'trust' problem. The end user started questioning if we actually knew what we were talking about when we suggested they retained their software version. Worst, they started asking if they should believe us when we said the new version, soon to be implemented in a new project, was compatible. They feared they would make the change and later on they would be informed that “the version they were using was buggy too”.
Do you see the problem? I am not sure if I am making myself understood but I can tell you it was messy. Those were the reasons for our 'finger pointing' session today. But everything will be fine, I know. All's well when it ends well and the damage control has been done.
Monday 29 September 2003
On the road again
Motion generates motion. And this re-appearing act, though a bit premature if health conditions are considered, is more than welcome to put an end to the marasm that was taking over my life.
I'm on my way to KL. Yes, I'm on the road again. And, boy I'm happy!
I'm on my way to KL. Yes, I'm on the road again. And, boy I'm happy!
Customer service? What's that? (Part II)
Maybe I am indeed getting old and grumpy as time passes. Or maybe I just refuse to accept bad customer service. I tell you a brief story and you judge for yourself...
My ATM card was about to break. Since I needed to go to the bank to withdraw some money to pay my credit card, I decided to replace it while there.
I joined the queue and waited for a couple of minutes. When it was finally my turn, I showed the card to the lady at the counter and explained I wanted it replaced before it was spoiled to the point I could not use it anymore. That's when the problems begun.
- Do you have your IC?
- No. I have my PIN, though.
- Sorry, I can't replace your card then.
- Why?
- Because I can't validate who you are.
- But I am not Singaporean. I do not have an IC!
- Do you have your passport with you?
- No. But I do not have to carry it around.
- You do.
- No, I do not.
At this point, her supervisor noticed something was happening and came to help.
- Can I help?
- He wants to get a new ATM Card.
- Ok, can I have your passport please?
- I do not have it with me.
- Then we cannot help, Sir.
- Why?
- We need the passport to verify you are the account owner.
- I do not have to carry my passport with me. Do you have yours with you?
- Well, your IC then.
- I am not Singaporean. I do not have an IC.
- But your work here, do you?
- Yes, and I have this account for three years already.
- Can I see your employment pass?
- Listen, how would my employment pass help you check I am who I say I am? It has no pictures and you do not have the equipment to check if it's fake or not.
- For your own protection we need some photo identification.
- For my own protection I have my PIN which is what the documents I signed when opening the account said would identify me to the bank!
- Oh, you do have your PIN?
- Of course! All you need is my PIN, nothing else. I can sign the same way, I have other cards with me, I can validate information like birthday, address and phone for you; I don't see why you can't replace my card! I am the customer. Aren't you supposed to make things easier for me?
Then she frowned, asked me to sign a piece of paper to check my signature, asked me to enter my PIN on the machine, asked me to answer a few questions and authorised the card replacement with a remark that next time I should carry my passport. Humph...
But it doesn't end there!
When the cashier gave me my new card I asked if she would withdraw some money for me.
- You can withdraw from the ATM machine in the front of the bank.
- Say what?!? No, I can't. Can you do it for me without me having to beg?
She got the card and asked how much. Four thousand, a hundred and fifty, I said.
- Oh, that amount you can't withdraw from the ATM.
- Exactly! I said without looking at her.
Now, tell me. Am I asking for too much? Are they doing me a favour? Should I be grateful for their benevolence in providing me with service I pay for anyway?
I decided to close the account. I am moving to Citibank. I will have problem with them too, I am sure. But I hope it would be less annoying than these bozos from OCBC.
My ATM card was about to break. Since I needed to go to the bank to withdraw some money to pay my credit card, I decided to replace it while there.
I joined the queue and waited for a couple of minutes. When it was finally my turn, I showed the card to the lady at the counter and explained I wanted it replaced before it was spoiled to the point I could not use it anymore. That's when the problems begun.
- Do you have your IC?
- No. I have my PIN, though.
- Sorry, I can't replace your card then.
- Why?
- Because I can't validate who you are.
- But I am not Singaporean. I do not have an IC!
- Do you have your passport with you?
- No. But I do not have to carry it around.
- You do.
- No, I do not.
At this point, her supervisor noticed something was happening and came to help.
- Can I help?
- He wants to get a new ATM Card.
- Ok, can I have your passport please?
- I do not have it with me.
- Then we cannot help, Sir.
- Why?
- We need the passport to verify you are the account owner.
- I do not have to carry my passport with me. Do you have yours with you?
- Well, your IC then.
- I am not Singaporean. I do not have an IC.
- But your work here, do you?
- Yes, and I have this account for three years already.
- Can I see your employment pass?
- Listen, how would my employment pass help you check I am who I say I am? It has no pictures and you do not have the equipment to check if it's fake or not.
- For your own protection we need some photo identification.
- For my own protection I have my PIN which is what the documents I signed when opening the account said would identify me to the bank!
- Oh, you do have your PIN?
- Of course! All you need is my PIN, nothing else. I can sign the same way, I have other cards with me, I can validate information like birthday, address and phone for you; I don't see why you can't replace my card! I am the customer. Aren't you supposed to make things easier for me?
Then she frowned, asked me to sign a piece of paper to check my signature, asked me to enter my PIN on the machine, asked me to answer a few questions and authorised the card replacement with a remark that next time I should carry my passport. Humph...
But it doesn't end there!
When the cashier gave me my new card I asked if she would withdraw some money for me.
- You can withdraw from the ATM machine in the front of the bank.
- Say what?!? No, I can't. Can you do it for me without me having to beg?
She got the card and asked how much. Four thousand, a hundred and fifty, I said.
- Oh, that amount you can't withdraw from the ATM.
- Exactly! I said without looking at her.
Now, tell me. Am I asking for too much? Are they doing me a favour? Should I be grateful for their benevolence in providing me with service I pay for anyway?
I decided to close the account. I am moving to Citibank. I will have problem with them too, I am sure. But I hope it would be less annoying than these bozos from OCBC.
Sunday 21 September 2003
Pull the damned plugs! I can't take it anymore...
I'm in the hospital. I was admitted yesterday. Well, it all begun Friday.
I had a soup and some cracker with tuna for dinner but I could tell it did not go too well. I felt bloated, burping too much. It pretty much felt like indigestion. A certain discomfort and heart burn; as you would feel after overeating something very heavy.
I drank some soda water, which usually helps, watched some TV and decided to go to bed. By then the slight discomfort was turning into pain and I wondered whether the soup or the tuna was spoiled. I tried some "Eno" and went to bed.
I couldn't sleep, though. It was really hurting and no matter what position I assumed in bed, it wasn't making it any better.
I hate throwing up. Some people do it so easily... For me it's always a nightmare. But since it was really getting worse, I had no choice but inserting a finger down my throat and inducing vomiting.
That, unfortunately did not help any and by 3:00AM I crying in pain. I decided to go to the hospital, determined to either have my stomach pumped or at least medicated for the pain.
I called a cab and proceeded to SGH (Singapore General Hospital). SGH is one of (if not the) best equipped hospitals in Singapore. That did not help me at all. In the end, it all boils down to people, believe me. And the quality of the service provided was lousy.
First, there was no queue but the lady at the admission desk took her time in filling in whatever details she had to input in her computer. Seriously, she took more than 10 minutes to insert my data and prepare my 'case'. Come on! Four o'clock in the morning, nobody waiting, no long queues... Is it asking too much to expect 'emergency' to be regarded as emergency? I realized that unless you are bleeding and unconscious, it's not an emergency. If you're having a heart attack, someone will come to ask questions and help you after you collapse. If you can spit some blood and open your eyes wide in a terror face or like a madman before the actual fainting, that could help getting a little bit of attention but it's not a guarantee.
After being admitted I was sent to see some recently graduated doctor who asked me the trivial questions: Are allergic to any medication? Have you ever undergone any major operation? What seems to be the problem?
Then she sent me to ECG saying heart attacks sometimes cause abdominal pain. Fair enough but, bloody hell, I was still in pain.
To make a long story short, I was attended to after 5:00AM, they had no idea what the problem was, I was given Buscopam for the pain, put to "observation" and released around 8:00AM.
Since I did not sleep much (or at all), I was very tired. That together with the Buscopam enabled me to finally rest a bit. But I woke up with pain again. This time I called Fred and WT for assistance. They recommended Gleneagles Hospital, a private one. Fred even drove me there. WT came to join me and help me shortly after.
I was diagnosed with gallbladder inflammation and scheduled for operation. Unfortunately, the doctors want to observe the pain I am going through in order to be sure the diagnosis is right so they don't want to give me any strong pain killer.
The suffering never ends...
I had a soup and some cracker with tuna for dinner but I could tell it did not go too well. I felt bloated, burping too much. It pretty much felt like indigestion. A certain discomfort and heart burn; as you would feel after overeating something very heavy.
I drank some soda water, which usually helps, watched some TV and decided to go to bed. By then the slight discomfort was turning into pain and I wondered whether the soup or the tuna was spoiled. I tried some "Eno" and went to bed.
I couldn't sleep, though. It was really hurting and no matter what position I assumed in bed, it wasn't making it any better.
I hate throwing up. Some people do it so easily... For me it's always a nightmare. But since it was really getting worse, I had no choice but inserting a finger down my throat and inducing vomiting.
That, unfortunately did not help any and by 3:00AM I crying in pain. I decided to go to the hospital, determined to either have my stomach pumped or at least medicated for the pain.
I called a cab and proceeded to SGH (Singapore General Hospital). SGH is one of (if not the) best equipped hospitals in Singapore. That did not help me at all. In the end, it all boils down to people, believe me. And the quality of the service provided was lousy.
First, there was no queue but the lady at the admission desk took her time in filling in whatever details she had to input in her computer. Seriously, she took more than 10 minutes to insert my data and prepare my 'case'. Come on! Four o'clock in the morning, nobody waiting, no long queues... Is it asking too much to expect 'emergency' to be regarded as emergency? I realized that unless you are bleeding and unconscious, it's not an emergency. If you're having a heart attack, someone will come to ask questions and help you after you collapse. If you can spit some blood and open your eyes wide in a terror face or like a madman before the actual fainting, that could help getting a little bit of attention but it's not a guarantee.
After being admitted I was sent to see some recently graduated doctor who asked me the trivial questions: Are allergic to any medication? Have you ever undergone any major operation? What seems to be the problem?
Then she sent me to ECG saying heart attacks sometimes cause abdominal pain. Fair enough but, bloody hell, I was still in pain.
To make a long story short, I was attended to after 5:00AM, they had no idea what the problem was, I was given Buscopam for the pain, put to "observation" and released around 8:00AM.
Since I did not sleep much (or at all), I was very tired. That together with the Buscopam enabled me to finally rest a bit. But I woke up with pain again. This time I called Fred and WT for assistance. They recommended Gleneagles Hospital, a private one. Fred even drove me there. WT came to join me and help me shortly after.
I was diagnosed with gallbladder inflammation and scheduled for operation. Unfortunately, the doctors want to observe the pain I am going through in order to be sure the diagnosis is right so they don't want to give me any strong pain killer.
The suffering never ends...
Wednesday 10 September 2003
On the spotlight
I don't know... Maybe I should avoid having too much coffee or maybe it is time to change jobs again. I get so pissed with certain things... But I am getting ahead of myself. This is what happened:
A good friend, a colleague from the office, is in Singapore. I am supposed to follow her around, accompany her to the customer's site. Since it was supposed to be just a meeting, I decided to wear a suit. I have some. I like them and though I do not *have* to wear them, I do not mind doing so and will do it whenever I have the chance.
In other words, if I am not going to be crawling under tables as it happens now and them in my line of work, I will wear a suit. I look good in them and as sad and silly as it is, the fact is: people treat you differently when you are in a suit.
Some guys from the office do not like it very much. Perhaps because they are not used to wearing suits. The weather in Singapore is very hot. Or perhaps because they do not want to look better than the customer they are visiting. But my opinion is that you should look your best for your customer. I mean, if you are going to pay the big bucks for someone's service, wouldn't you expect that someone to look good?
I know it sounds silly, but bear with me for a minute. Let's say you are going to have a heart surgery. You are going to pay over $2000 dollars a day for some surgeon's service and pretty much put your life in his hands. You go visit her/him and she/he is dressed in sweat pants and a worn out T-Shirt. Do you get a good impression? I don't think so.
Sure I am exaggerating things for the sake a making a point but in a smaller scale this is basically the same situation I have on a daily basis. Customers do pay over US$2000 for my services. I could show up in jeans but, does that cause a good impression? Point made? Ok.
So this is what happened. My friend and I are going to meet the customer. It is a pre-sales engagement so I do not have to fix computers, go under desks or anything like that. She is nicely dressed and I am wearing a suit. At the customer site we meet the Sales Manager and he's not wearing a suit. My problem? No, I am sorry. The customer looks at me and goes "Oh, you look sharp today, huh?" and before I can say thanks he jumps into conversation saying:
- Yeah, he's Brazilian. I guess they do not have many chances to wear suits there.
Hey, hold on a moment! Where the f*ck did that come from? I got pissed instantly. I don't get paid to get this kind of crap. But I smile and pretend I did not mind the stupid comment...
Oh, the things we have to do to keep our jobs...
After that comment the customer lost the respect. Now the "guy in the suit" is "ok" and "it's ok to make fun of him". Gosh I HATE this.
I had to go to the toilet and the bloody office is one of those stupid buildings where everything is locked and the restrooms are outside the office area. I ask the customer:
- Can I borrow the pass to the toilet, please?
- Are you going to the toilet AGAIN?, she asks.
- What do you mean again? I just arrived!
- Yeah, but you went to the toilet yesterday, right?
- Oh, ha... Yes. Haha (pretending to find the joke extremely amusing. Duh!)
Then the Sales Manager asks:
- How often do you go to the toilet a day?
- Well, if you really have to know, I go once every half hour. Do you have a problem with that?
There was no reply. I guess he noticed I was getting aggressive already. Good. Maybe he will leave me alone for the rest of the day.
A good friend, a colleague from the office, is in Singapore. I am supposed to follow her around, accompany her to the customer's site. Since it was supposed to be just a meeting, I decided to wear a suit. I have some. I like them and though I do not *have* to wear them, I do not mind doing so and will do it whenever I have the chance.
In other words, if I am not going to be crawling under tables as it happens now and them in my line of work, I will wear a suit. I look good in them and as sad and silly as it is, the fact is: people treat you differently when you are in a suit.
Some guys from the office do not like it very much. Perhaps because they are not used to wearing suits. The weather in Singapore is very hot. Or perhaps because they do not want to look better than the customer they are visiting. But my opinion is that you should look your best for your customer. I mean, if you are going to pay the big bucks for someone's service, wouldn't you expect that someone to look good?
I know it sounds silly, but bear with me for a minute. Let's say you are going to have a heart surgery. You are going to pay over $2000 dollars a day for some surgeon's service and pretty much put your life in his hands. You go visit her/him and she/he is dressed in sweat pants and a worn out T-Shirt. Do you get a good impression? I don't think so.
Sure I am exaggerating things for the sake a making a point but in a smaller scale this is basically the same situation I have on a daily basis. Customers do pay over US$2000 for my services. I could show up in jeans but, does that cause a good impression? Point made? Ok.
So this is what happened. My friend and I are going to meet the customer. It is a pre-sales engagement so I do not have to fix computers, go under desks or anything like that. She is nicely dressed and I am wearing a suit. At the customer site we meet the Sales Manager and he's not wearing a suit. My problem? No, I am sorry. The customer looks at me and goes "Oh, you look sharp today, huh?" and before I can say thanks he jumps into conversation saying:
- Yeah, he's Brazilian. I guess they do not have many chances to wear suits there.
Hey, hold on a moment! Where the f*ck did that come from? I got pissed instantly. I don't get paid to get this kind of crap. But I smile and pretend I did not mind the stupid comment...
Oh, the things we have to do to keep our jobs...
After that comment the customer lost the respect. Now the "guy in the suit" is "ok" and "it's ok to make fun of him". Gosh I HATE this.
I had to go to the toilet and the bloody office is one of those stupid buildings where everything is locked and the restrooms are outside the office area. I ask the customer:
- Can I borrow the pass to the toilet, please?
- Are you going to the toilet AGAIN?, she asks.
- What do you mean again? I just arrived!
- Yeah, but you went to the toilet yesterday, right?
- Oh, ha... Yes. Haha (pretending to find the joke extremely amusing. Duh!)
Then the Sales Manager asks:
- How often do you go to the toilet a day?
- Well, if you really have to know, I go once every half hour. Do you have a problem with that?
There was no reply. I guess he noticed I was getting aggressive already. Good. Maybe he will leave me alone for the rest of the day.
Wednesday 3 September 2003
But, when you're not looking...
Ok, this is old news already but though I haven't been updating so frequently I just could not let go of the information. The need to write about it has been nagging me for a while.
Remember I mentioned Muslims say they do not care about non-Muslims affairs? Well, turns out a local paper in Malaysia published a small but very elucidating article about a 'conflict of interests' on the planning for next October's Deepavali, the Indian New Year.
According to the article, the Indian community in Malaysia was very upset with the government because of an imposed ban on dancing, singing and liquor consumption during the Deepavali festival in 'the interest' of the Muslim community that could 'perhaps' attend.
Indians were shocked, of course. This is a cultural thing for them and, being non-Muslims, there is usually lots of singing, drinking and dancing. They are like that. They wait all year for that. Now, after years of tradition, the government wants to make it illegal? Because Muslims would *perhaps* attend? Does it sound fair to you? It certainly did not to them.
They approached the authorities in disagreement and a whole argument started.
I say: They are non-Muslims. It's a non-Muslim festivity. Put a huge sign outside the festivity surroundings saying "Fellow Muslims Citizens, welcome to Deepavali; here we dance, sing and drink. If you find it offensive and/or do not agree: PISS OFF!". Then, make sure the police is available to punish any Muslims that try to get in and have fun. Problem solved.
As I told you, this is old news and though I kept the original article I could not find it while writing this. Nevertheless, you can find traces of the original discussion by browsing the online version of The Star.
Humph! Minding their own business, huh? Yeah, right...
Remember I mentioned Muslims say they do not care about non-Muslims affairs? Well, turns out a local paper in Malaysia published a small but very elucidating article about a 'conflict of interests' on the planning for next October's Deepavali, the Indian New Year.
According to the article, the Indian community in Malaysia was very upset with the government because of an imposed ban on dancing, singing and liquor consumption during the Deepavali festival in 'the interest' of the Muslim community that could 'perhaps' attend.
Indians were shocked, of course. This is a cultural thing for them and, being non-Muslims, there is usually lots of singing, drinking and dancing. They are like that. They wait all year for that. Now, after years of tradition, the government wants to make it illegal? Because Muslims would *perhaps* attend? Does it sound fair to you? It certainly did not to them.
They approached the authorities in disagreement and a whole argument started.
I say: They are non-Muslims. It's a non-Muslim festivity. Put a huge sign outside the festivity surroundings saying "Fellow Muslims Citizens, welcome to Deepavali; here we dance, sing and drink. If you find it offensive and/or do not agree: PISS OFF!". Then, make sure the police is available to punish any Muslims that try to get in and have fun. Problem solved.
As I told you, this is old news and though I kept the original article I could not find it while writing this. Nevertheless, you can find traces of the original discussion by browsing the online version of The Star.
Humph! Minding their own business, huh? Yeah, right...
Sunday 31 August 2003
Time to say goodbye
After a few days in Bangkok, it's time to head home. This short trip was quite good to relax a bit, have my teeth treated and the pain in my back fixed.
Some time ago, last time I was in Thailand, actually, I saw this advertisement about laser teeth whitening on a in-flight magazine and got really interested. Back then I had a chipped tooth that needed some attention so I went to the place and had a very good impression of the doctor, the staff and the clinic.
This time I wanted to have some of my old metal fillings replaced with new natural 'teeth like' ceramic ones and since my teeth were going to 'look good' (not that they look bad, but anyway) I decided to go for the 'whitening' thing too.
The brochure they gave me to read stated the process was painless as it involved no heat, drills or anything that caused pain. The only side effect of the procedure was a 'slight sensitive' feeling the day after.
Well, that might be true for Thai nationals but this Brazilian friend of yours can tell you without lying: It hurts like hell.
I don't know what they do but during the process I could feel sharp pain in all teeth. Little did I know it was but a sample of the pains I'd suffer later.
They gave me some pills for the pain but that didn't help much. The day after my teeth still hurt. And just yesterday evening things got better.
I returned today to have two fillings replaced which proves I'm not scared of pain. Well, not too much...
Yulia, my “soon to be” Russian girlfriend kept me company all these days by sending me SMSs all the time. She's such a doll. I'm so infatuated already; I can't wait to go see her in person.
Some time ago, last time I was in Thailand, actually, I saw this advertisement about laser teeth whitening on a in-flight magazine and got really interested. Back then I had a chipped tooth that needed some attention so I went to the place and had a very good impression of the doctor, the staff and the clinic.
This time I wanted to have some of my old metal fillings replaced with new natural 'teeth like' ceramic ones and since my teeth were going to 'look good' (not that they look bad, but anyway) I decided to go for the 'whitening' thing too.
The brochure they gave me to read stated the process was painless as it involved no heat, drills or anything that caused pain. The only side effect of the procedure was a 'slight sensitive' feeling the day after.
Well, that might be true for Thai nationals but this Brazilian friend of yours can tell you without lying: It hurts like hell.
I don't know what they do but during the process I could feel sharp pain in all teeth. Little did I know it was but a sample of the pains I'd suffer later.
They gave me some pills for the pain but that didn't help much. The day after my teeth still hurt. And just yesterday evening things got better.
I returned today to have two fillings replaced which proves I'm not scared of pain. Well, not too much...
Yulia, my “soon to be” Russian girlfriend kept me company all these days by sending me SMSs all the time. She's such a doll. I'm so infatuated already; I can't wait to go see her in person.
Wednesday 27 August 2003
Flying Finnair
I got back from KL just this afternoon. It was only 4 o'clock when I got to the office. In a normal situation I'd go home directly but this time, an important correspondence was waiting for me at Genesys. When the Singapore Inland Revenue sends you a notification, you pay attention. After all, this is Singapore and everyone knows about the 'cane'!
So I went to the office, got my mail, paid my debt thus guaranteeing the safety of my buttocks and finally headed home, where another flight ticket waited.
I'm on my way to Bangkok. Finnair had the best price: only S$180 for a round trip. Trust me, that is indeed very cheapo. I mean, go for a two hours Traditional Thai Massage in Singapore and you will easily pay S$120! This is my first time flying with them and I am sort of curious. Let's see if they have beautiful stewardesses in a nice new plane.
- - -
Erm... Just so you know: No, they don't!
So I went to the office, got my mail, paid my debt thus guaranteeing the safety of my buttocks and finally headed home, where another flight ticket waited.
I'm on my way to Bangkok. Finnair had the best price: only S$180 for a round trip. Trust me, that is indeed very cheapo. I mean, go for a two hours Traditional Thai Massage in Singapore and you will easily pay S$120! This is my first time flying with them and I am sort of curious. Let's see if they have beautiful stewardesses in a nice new plane.
- - -
Erm... Just so you know: No, they don't!
Sunday 24 August 2003
Before I hit the road again...
Yes, I know... It’s been quite a while since I last updated the Blog. So much have happened that I just have been having trouble keeping up with all that needs to be done. Even my good friend Itty Bitty Pittey mentioned I have been stalling. He's right, so let me do a brief update before hitting the road again.
Jana, the Latvian girl, wants to come and visit me in October. I was happy with the idea until she felt really comfortable to tell me things she did not mention before. I know we all have skeletons in the closet but how we deal with them makes a lot of difference, I think.
So this is how it started. She said in September she is going to South Africa to meet some other guy she was exchanging messages with. No big deal for me, after how could I possibly expect to be the only one who replied to her online profile on the dating site? Then she said she wanted to email the guy and tell him ‘everything’ was over because she had found someone else: Me. Hmmm... Ok. I was flattered for a moment till my slow thinking brain said “Whoah! Hold on a second!”
She can change her mind that easily? I mean, she knows me just as much as she knows the African guy. What makes her think I am a better catch? And why change plans like this, so suddenly? If I was the South African fellow, I would be pissed. All the plans he made meant nothing to her? I told her I did not want her to change her plans on my account. She should go, meet him and after that she could come to meet me, if that was the case. Then she would know what to do. So the idea was for her to go to Johannesburg in September and come to Singapore in October.
But those plans changed again whe she mentioned she had a boyfriend. Say what?!? What the heck someone with boyfriend wants with a profile on a dating site? I asked her and her answer was “We are not getting along fine. He is abusive and drinks too much. I need to find happiness in life and move on.” Fair enough, but why is she still with him?
I asked her “Does he know you are planning on meeting other guys?” Guess her answer. Bingo! Nopes; the poor fellow doesn’t have a clue of what is going on behind his back. That was a turn off for me. This is history repeating itself. I was in his shoes once. Well, I wasn’t abusive or a drunk but, I mean, I never knew what was going to hit me till it was too late. It is unfair. It doesn’t really matter if he is an asshole or not. If she is not happy, solve the damn relationship before looking for a new one. What’s the matter with people nowadays? Geez...
The red card is raised: Jana is out.
Olga is one of the Russian cuties. Her English is quite good and and I was very suprised she can speak well (we spoke on the phone). She is very sweet, shares similar interests and is the ‘good girl’ type. I have problems with good girls, I am sure I mentioned a couple of times before. Nevertheless, she is so cute and sweet and willing to be a good wife I gave in and got interested. The only problem is: she’s the only child of a widow mother. Get the picture? Her Mom is terribly concerned about her little girl travelling all the way to Southeast Asia to meet the Big Bad Wolf.
What am I to say? I would be too if she was my daughter. So, correspondence with her slowed down a bit. I told her I would love to visit Russia and her but that cannot happen right now. She sends me emails every other day saying she misses me and that she is sorry there isn’t much she can do. She says she is still trying to convince her Mom it is fine, after all I gave her all possible information so she could at least verify I am not a “flesh trader” interested in selling white slaves.
In the end, I think her mother knows that. She just wants to take the opportunity to visit SE Asia too, you know? But I am not that naïve. If she wants to come, she’s mostly welcome provided she pays for her own expenses.
Yellow card: Careful missy!
While all this was happening with Jana and Olga, Yulia (the other Russian cutie) found ways to get me quite interested. Unlike the other girls, she was not very much interested in being agreeable all the time and she is not really concerned if she can come or if I should go. Her mother is a businesswoman and they have a good financial situation. She has travelled a lot too so getting out of her country is not her immediate plans.
I have learned that for most of these girls, this is the case. They are unhappy with the situation of their own countries and want to find a foreign husband. Ha! Isn’t it the case in some places here in SE Asia as well? But that is certainly not the case for Yulia. Though I do not criticise the other girls for trying to find a better place to live (Hey, why do you think I live in Singapore not in Brazil?) that is a plus in Yulia’s profile. If the main reason is not so material, I think the chance of having true love is higher, don’t you think?
Anyway, we have been exchanging lots of messages, getting to know each other the best way we can. She writes well though she cannot speak fluently. I don’t know... I am beginning to think this could be it.
As you would expect, with all this happening lately, Miss Ex-GF might have felt our love ties were being threatened and decided to call. Again. She called three times last week.
The first time she called it was 4:30 in the morning. The house phone rang once and stopped. One minute later, it happened again – rang once and stopped. It happened a couple of times and I was already annoyed and about to switch off the phone. Who could be calling my home at those hours?! Then, maybe because I was already half awake I realised it could be J’s parents.
No one has my home number (I am never home, for Christ sake, why bother?) but our parents do. Mine and hers, I mean. So I figured it could be her parents, mine would call directly.
I called back and she answered the phone.
- “Hi”, I said, “Is everything alright?”
- “Yes, why do you ask?”, She said.
- “I dunno... Someone was calling and hanging up after the first ring. I got worried. Thought something might have happened!”
- “No – did anyone call Singapore?” she asked the others. “No, no one called.”
- “Hmm... Ok, then...”
A brief moment of silence and then she said:
- “You know I am lying, don’t you?”
- “Yes. I figured.”
She apologised and said she missed me. Well, you know the story by know. “She loves me”, “I am the one”, “She cries every day”, yada yada yada. All the right things to say. It would work if I did not know her too well. I avoided the confrontation, talked a bit, said I needed to get back to sleep, that I was going to call later, good-bye, kisses to everyone... Kaput. Conversation over. But I knew it wasn’t over yet.
She called again two more times in different days. And the last time, today early in the morning, she said she broke up with the boyfriend and wanted to return to Singapore. She said she knows she is about to loose me for good (spooky, ain’t it?) and she doesn’t want that.
I told her we tried too many times already and the result is always the same. I told her I am happy I do not have to worry about who might be visiting my house in my absence. I told her I do not miss all the silly arguments, that it is unfair for her to call me like this after all we’ve been through and after I am finally able to let go (am I?) and meet people who can make me happy (can they?). In the end, I told her I had to think about it.
Why? Do I want her back? What about Yulia? What about the possibility of meeting someone special? Am I willing to postpone this possibility of meeting someone new yet again? Is it worth it trying to fix something I know cannot be fixed?
[deep sigh]
Well, some other brief news. I am pleased to announce I am the happy owner of my own domain now. There is nothing there yet but soon I will be transferring my Blog and re-creating my web site at www.thewolftrack.com! Yessssss!
Tomorrow I am taking the first morning flight (6:30 in the morning... Ouch!) to Kuala Lumpur. Yep, yet another round of fun with the Outbound Solution due to a server crash. Guys, read my lips:
“BACKUP”
And talking about crashes, my 40Gb hard disk on the laptop crashed. Huh?! You think you got me cornered, do you? I am so sorry to disappoint you: I had backups! Muahahahaha! (Unavoidable Evil laughter). I am in the process of re-creating my working environment in an new 60Gb hard disk. :o)
Well, I guess this is it.
Tata
Jana, the Latvian girl, wants to come and visit me in October. I was happy with the idea until she felt really comfortable to tell me things she did not mention before. I know we all have skeletons in the closet but how we deal with them makes a lot of difference, I think.
So this is how it started. She said in September she is going to South Africa to meet some other guy she was exchanging messages with. No big deal for me, after how could I possibly expect to be the only one who replied to her online profile on the dating site? Then she said she wanted to email the guy and tell him ‘everything’ was over because she had found someone else: Me. Hmmm... Ok. I was flattered for a moment till my slow thinking brain said “Whoah! Hold on a second!”
She can change her mind that easily? I mean, she knows me just as much as she knows the African guy. What makes her think I am a better catch? And why change plans like this, so suddenly? If I was the South African fellow, I would be pissed. All the plans he made meant nothing to her? I told her I did not want her to change her plans on my account. She should go, meet him and after that she could come to meet me, if that was the case. Then she would know what to do. So the idea was for her to go to Johannesburg in September and come to Singapore in October.
But those plans changed again whe she mentioned she had a boyfriend. Say what?!? What the heck someone with boyfriend wants with a profile on a dating site? I asked her and her answer was “We are not getting along fine. He is abusive and drinks too much. I need to find happiness in life and move on.” Fair enough, but why is she still with him?
I asked her “Does he know you are planning on meeting other guys?” Guess her answer. Bingo! Nopes; the poor fellow doesn’t have a clue of what is going on behind his back. That was a turn off for me. This is history repeating itself. I was in his shoes once. Well, I wasn’t abusive or a drunk but, I mean, I never knew what was going to hit me till it was too late. It is unfair. It doesn’t really matter if he is an asshole or not. If she is not happy, solve the damn relationship before looking for a new one. What’s the matter with people nowadays? Geez...
The red card is raised: Jana is out.
Olga is one of the Russian cuties. Her English is quite good and and I was very suprised she can speak well (we spoke on the phone). She is very sweet, shares similar interests and is the ‘good girl’ type. I have problems with good girls, I am sure I mentioned a couple of times before. Nevertheless, she is so cute and sweet and willing to be a good wife I gave in and got interested. The only problem is: she’s the only child of a widow mother. Get the picture? Her Mom is terribly concerned about her little girl travelling all the way to Southeast Asia to meet the Big Bad Wolf.
What am I to say? I would be too if she was my daughter. So, correspondence with her slowed down a bit. I told her I would love to visit Russia and her but that cannot happen right now. She sends me emails every other day saying she misses me and that she is sorry there isn’t much she can do. She says she is still trying to convince her Mom it is fine, after all I gave her all possible information so she could at least verify I am not a “flesh trader” interested in selling white slaves.
In the end, I think her mother knows that. She just wants to take the opportunity to visit SE Asia too, you know? But I am not that naïve. If she wants to come, she’s mostly welcome provided she pays for her own expenses.
Yellow card: Careful missy!
While all this was happening with Jana and Olga, Yulia (the other Russian cutie) found ways to get me quite interested. Unlike the other girls, she was not very much interested in being agreeable all the time and she is not really concerned if she can come or if I should go. Her mother is a businesswoman and they have a good financial situation. She has travelled a lot too so getting out of her country is not her immediate plans.
I have learned that for most of these girls, this is the case. They are unhappy with the situation of their own countries and want to find a foreign husband. Ha! Isn’t it the case in some places here in SE Asia as well? But that is certainly not the case for Yulia. Though I do not criticise the other girls for trying to find a better place to live (Hey, why do you think I live in Singapore not in Brazil?) that is a plus in Yulia’s profile. If the main reason is not so material, I think the chance of having true love is higher, don’t you think?
Anyway, we have been exchanging lots of messages, getting to know each other the best way we can. She writes well though she cannot speak fluently. I don’t know... I am beginning to think this could be it.
As you would expect, with all this happening lately, Miss Ex-GF might have felt our love ties were being threatened and decided to call. Again. She called three times last week.
The first time she called it was 4:30 in the morning. The house phone rang once and stopped. One minute later, it happened again – rang once and stopped. It happened a couple of times and I was already annoyed and about to switch off the phone. Who could be calling my home at those hours?! Then, maybe because I was already half awake I realised it could be J’s parents.
No one has my home number (I am never home, for Christ sake, why bother?) but our parents do. Mine and hers, I mean. So I figured it could be her parents, mine would call directly.
I called back and she answered the phone.
- “Hi”, I said, “Is everything alright?”
- “Yes, why do you ask?”, She said.
- “I dunno... Someone was calling and hanging up after the first ring. I got worried. Thought something might have happened!”
- “No – did anyone call Singapore?” she asked the others. “No, no one called.”
- “Hmm... Ok, then...”
A brief moment of silence and then she said:
- “You know I am lying, don’t you?”
- “Yes. I figured.”
She apologised and said she missed me. Well, you know the story by know. “She loves me”, “I am the one”, “She cries every day”, yada yada yada. All the right things to say. It would work if I did not know her too well. I avoided the confrontation, talked a bit, said I needed to get back to sleep, that I was going to call later, good-bye, kisses to everyone... Kaput. Conversation over. But I knew it wasn’t over yet.
She called again two more times in different days. And the last time, today early in the morning, she said she broke up with the boyfriend and wanted to return to Singapore. She said she knows she is about to loose me for good (spooky, ain’t it?) and she doesn’t want that.
I told her we tried too many times already and the result is always the same. I told her I am happy I do not have to worry about who might be visiting my house in my absence. I told her I do not miss all the silly arguments, that it is unfair for her to call me like this after all we’ve been through and after I am finally able to let go (am I?) and meet people who can make me happy (can they?). In the end, I told her I had to think about it.
Why? Do I want her back? What about Yulia? What about the possibility of meeting someone special? Am I willing to postpone this possibility of meeting someone new yet again? Is it worth it trying to fix something I know cannot be fixed?
[deep sigh]
Well, some other brief news. I am pleased to announce I am the happy owner of my own domain now. There is nothing there yet but soon I will be transferring my Blog and re-creating my web site at www.thewolftrack.com! Yessssss!
Tomorrow I am taking the first morning flight (6:30 in the morning... Ouch!) to Kuala Lumpur. Yep, yet another round of fun with the Outbound Solution due to a server crash. Guys, read my lips:
“BACKUP”
And talking about crashes, my 40Gb hard disk on the laptop crashed. Huh?! You think you got me cornered, do you? I am so sorry to disappoint you: I had backups! Muahahahaha! (Unavoidable Evil laughter). I am in the process of re-creating my working environment in an new 60Gb hard disk. :o)
Well, I guess this is it.
Tata
Thursday 7 August 2003
Zzzzz...
Oh, somebody shoot me and end my misery... It's only 10:30am and I feel as if I had been here since Christmas!
Fred lent me his wireless access card so I could check emails. Apart from SPAM there was nothing there. It's Jana's day off so I am not expecting messages from her. It would be nice if Olga wrote; I have a feeling she will. But it's still too early for her. She's one of the Russian girls I mentioned. Russia is GMT+3, five hours behind, so I believe it's only 5:30am there; another good 3 hours till I receive something.
Yulia, the other Russian cutie, did not write yesterday. She sent pictures, yes, but did not 'write'. Pity, 'cause she writes well...
Ok, let me resume my previous activity: being bored.
Fred lent me his wireless access card so I could check emails. Apart from SPAM there was nothing there. It's Jana's day off so I am not expecting messages from her. It would be nice if Olga wrote; I have a feeling she will. But it's still too early for her. She's one of the Russian girls I mentioned. Russia is GMT+3, five hours behind, so I believe it's only 5:30am there; another good 3 hours till I receive something.
Yulia, the other Russian cutie, did not write yesterday. She sent pictures, yes, but did not 'write'. Pity, 'cause she writes well...
Ok, let me resume my previous activity: being bored.
It's Show Time
Quick break from the seminar, the customers come out of the room for coffee, tee and quick snacks. This is my cue, my time to work. But I too needed something to drink so I got myself a cup of tea without sugar (my stomach still upset) and quickly returned to my position.
Fred was entertaining a young lady who was asking all sorts of generic questions. Not as basic as the ones I answered in the morning - she understood what a Contact Centre was - but still, not very specific. She basically said "can you tell me more about all this?" I was slowly sipping on my tea but Fred, cunning as a fox, saw me there too comfortable and free and dropped this: "I only do the sales part. Let me introduce you to my expert. This is Georges!" Ouch!
But I guess it wasn't so bad. I gave her a five-minute no-brainer description of what Workforce Manager is all about, benefits for her as a contact centre supervisor, for her company in terms or savings, the Sales speech, you know. She was happy. I was happy. Then, as I saw Fred was too comfortable and free I dropped this: "... and it integrates tightly with our entire range of solutions. Fred can talk to you about routing and multimedia contact centres."
Haha! The sweet taste of revenge! ;o)
Fred was entertaining a young lady who was asking all sorts of generic questions. Not as basic as the ones I answered in the morning - she understood what a Contact Centre was - but still, not very specific. She basically said "can you tell me more about all this?" I was slowly sipping on my tea but Fred, cunning as a fox, saw me there too comfortable and free and dropped this: "I only do the sales part. Let me introduce you to my expert. This is Georges!" Ouch!
But I guess it wasn't so bad. I gave her a five-minute no-brainer description of what Workforce Manager is all about, benefits for her as a contact centre supervisor, for her company in terms or savings, the Sales speech, you know. She was happy. I was happy. Then, as I saw Fred was too comfortable and free I dropped this: "... and it integrates tightly with our entire range of solutions. Fred can talk to you about routing and multimedia contact centres."
Haha! The sweet taste of revenge! ;o)
Wednesday 6 August 2003
Will I ever understand?
I was getting ready to go to sleep yesterday night when in came an SMS from Lin. I do not quite remember the actual conversation but it went somewhat like this:
- Sleeping already?, she asked.
- Not really, was my reply.
- Watching some movie on the TV? Hehehe
- No, just getting ready to hit the sack. I am tired and have to wake up very early tomorrow.
- Ok. Good night.
- Ok. Good night.
I don’t know why but I had this impression she was pissed. Maybe it is her way of being kind and not preventing me from my well deserved sleep but is it normal in the region to interrupt the conversation so abruptdly?
In my country, a friend talking to me would have said: "Oh, ok. I do not mean to disturb. Just thought we could talk a little. We can talk tomorrow. Have a good rest." Doesn't it sound more polite? Or gentle?
If she was German I would have not thought much about it. Germans are usually very practical people. They make a phone call, the person answers identifying himself/herself by family name, the originator gives the message and hangs up. No need for 'how are yous' or ' goodbyes'.
Maybe it's the one quarter Dutch she's got in her blood... I will never understand.
I was getting ready to go to sleep yesterday night when in came an SMS from Lin. I do not quite remember the actual conversation but it went somewhat like this:
- Sleeping already?, she asked.
- Not really, was my reply.
- Watching some movie on the TV? Hehehe
- No, just getting ready to hit the sack. I am tired and have to wake up very early tomorrow.
- Ok. Good night.
- Ok. Good night.
I don’t know why but I had this impression she was pissed. Maybe it is her way of being kind and not preventing me from my well deserved sleep but is it normal in the region to interrupt the conversation so abruptdly?
In my country, a friend talking to me would have said: "Oh, ok. I do not mean to disturb. Just thought we could talk a little. We can talk tomorrow. Have a good rest." Doesn't it sound more polite? Or gentle?
If she was German I would have not thought much about it. Germans are usually very practical people. They make a phone call, the person answers identifying himself/herself by family name, the originator gives the message and hangs up. No need for 'how are yous' or ' goodbyes'.
Maybe it's the one quarter Dutch she's got in her blood... I will never understand.
Customer Service? What's that?
So, I was bored. Had been standing by our laptops, smiling at whoever approached, answering questions like "what is this exactly?", "what you mean by call centres?" and alike. Fred probably noticed I wasn't amused and suggested I went out to buy a couple of 'lattes' across the street. I had nothing better to do, so I went.
When I got to 'The Coffee Bean', the place was empty. There was just this employee at the back of the store. She saw me standing there but did not seem interested in helping. I was annoyed.
- Excuse me? Is the store open yet?
She gave me a dirty look and proceeded to the cashier without a word. I was at the end of the counter so I returned to the cashier.
- Yes?, she said.
- Good morning!, I said. A moment of silence followed. I was naive to think she would actually smile and say 'good morning' back to me...
- I want two 'lattes'.
- Having here or take away?
- Take away.
While she prepared the coffee and cups, I filled in one of those 'how can we save you better' forms. Suggestions? Your employee needs to have more sex!!!
No, of course I did not write that. But the idea crossed my mind...
When I got to 'The Coffee Bean', the place was empty. There was just this employee at the back of the store. She saw me standing there but did not seem interested in helping. I was annoyed.
- Excuse me? Is the store open yet?
She gave me a dirty look and proceeded to the cashier without a word. I was at the end of the counter so I returned to the cashier.
- Yes?, she said.
- Good morning!, I said. A moment of silence followed. I was naive to think she would actually smile and say 'good morning' back to me...
- I want two 'lattes'.
- Having here or take away?
- Take away.
While she prepared the coffee and cups, I filled in one of those 'how can we save you better' forms. Suggestions? Your employee needs to have more sex!!!
No, of course I did not write that. But the idea crossed my mind...
The Workshot in KL
This is going to be a long day, I'm telling you. It started during the night because I couldn't sleep properly. The air-conditioner in my room was broken; I could not adjust the temperature and it was (amazingly) freezing cold. So I had to turn it off. Then, of course, the room became too hot during the night. I woke partly because I was sweating, partly because of nightmares.
The nightmares were my fault. For dinner, which I said I wasn't going to have, I had a Rotti Prata at the next door eatery. It wasn't bad but from the first bite I took I could tell it wasn't well cooked. You know what happens when you eat bread, cakes or whatever food prepared with flour and it is not properly cooked, right? It becomes a stone in your stomach and takes ages to digest. That's exactly what happened. I woke up with the feeling I had eaten an anvil. A spoiled one, in fact.
I had two choices: 1) insert a finger in my throat and try to throw up or 2) stand the discomfort. I chose option two; rolled to my tummy and tried to sleep despite the pain. Eventually I fell asleep again to wake up this morning 20 minutes before the alarm clock was off.
I checked my emails (one sweet message from Jana, the Latvian girl), checked my phone for SMSs (two from Jana again. So cute!) and after the "3S" routine (sh*t, shower and shave) I was ready and good to go.
Joe, the Sales Director, asked if I could have everything ready before the audience arrived, at 8 o'clock. So I got downstairs to the ballroom, where event was supposed to take place at 7:30. Just as I expected, the hotel employees were still preparing the place. I just sat there, trying not to be bored to death...
The nightmares were my fault. For dinner, which I said I wasn't going to have, I had a Rotti Prata at the next door eatery. It wasn't bad but from the first bite I took I could tell it wasn't well cooked. You know what happens when you eat bread, cakes or whatever food prepared with flour and it is not properly cooked, right? It becomes a stone in your stomach and takes ages to digest. That's exactly what happened. I woke up with the feeling I had eaten an anvil. A spoiled one, in fact.
I had two choices: 1) insert a finger in my throat and try to throw up or 2) stand the discomfort. I chose option two; rolled to my tummy and tried to sleep despite the pain. Eventually I fell asleep again to wake up this morning 20 minutes before the alarm clock was off.
I checked my emails (one sweet message from Jana, the Latvian girl), checked my phone for SMSs (two from Jana again. So cute!) and after the "3S" routine (sh*t, shower and shave) I was ready and good to go.
Joe, the Sales Director, asked if I could have everything ready before the audience arrived, at 8 o'clock. So I got downstairs to the ballroom, where event was supposed to take place at 7:30. Just as I expected, the hotel employees were still preparing the place. I just sat there, trying not to be bored to death...
Monday 4 August 2003
Time for an update
I haven't been posting, I know... So much has happened I don't even know where to begin. Let's see... Perhaps it would be easier if I just mentioned thing as they come to mind. Hmmm... Yes. Let's do that.
I was forced to put some distance between Noor and I. I was feeling pressured by her constant presence and need for attention. Mental note to myself: do not be like that. It is really annoying!
Lin decided not to let go of our friendship. She ignored me for a while but I guess she realized that, though I'm a jerk and undoubtedly not her 'dream partner', I'm still worth keeping as a friend. So she calls and sends messages now and them. I like it like that. I take it as a sign of friendship evolving. And I admire her, so I also think she is worthwhile. Seems we came to a mutual understanding. Good.
J called and wanted to come back. Of course... I saw it coming. She said she's got a boyfriend she doesn't love because she can't get over me. Sweet? Yes. True? I don't think so. We talked and agreed she should think a bit more about it. Then she called again, said she broke up with the boyfriend but started having second thoughts afterwards. That says it all, doesn't it?
Koi decided she doesn't want to loose me. We've been apart for a while now and the distance between us grew a lot. It seems she decided to 'keep the flame burning' by fighting her own cultural restraints and acting 'naughty' just to please me. Gotta tell you – it is working! What am I to say? I'm easy!
I asked her - "What happened? Aren’t you shy anymore?" and she said: "No, because you don't like shy girls. If I'm shy, you won't like me!"
I feel bad because I know she's changing her ways in an effort not to loose me. And from my part, I am still skeptical it could work as she is trying to be something she just isn't. But she's not a kid anymore and I have to stop worrying too much about others... She is supposed to know what she is doing.
I've been exchanging emails with four new girls; one Singaporean with Indian background, two Russians (!) and one Latvian (!!!). Is this going to lead anywhere? I don't know. Who can tell?
I was forced to put some distance between Noor and I. I was feeling pressured by her constant presence and need for attention. Mental note to myself: do not be like that. It is really annoying!
Lin decided not to let go of our friendship. She ignored me for a while but I guess she realized that, though I'm a jerk and undoubtedly not her 'dream partner', I'm still worth keeping as a friend. So she calls and sends messages now and them. I like it like that. I take it as a sign of friendship evolving. And I admire her, so I also think she is worthwhile. Seems we came to a mutual understanding. Good.
J called and wanted to come back. Of course... I saw it coming. She said she's got a boyfriend she doesn't love because she can't get over me. Sweet? Yes. True? I don't think so. We talked and agreed she should think a bit more about it. Then she called again, said she broke up with the boyfriend but started having second thoughts afterwards. That says it all, doesn't it?
Koi decided she doesn't want to loose me. We've been apart for a while now and the distance between us grew a lot. It seems she decided to 'keep the flame burning' by fighting her own cultural restraints and acting 'naughty' just to please me. Gotta tell you – it is working! What am I to say? I'm easy!
I asked her - "What happened? Aren’t you shy anymore?" and she said: "No, because you don't like shy girls. If I'm shy, you won't like me!"
I feel bad because I know she's changing her ways in an effort not to loose me. And from my part, I am still skeptical it could work as she is trying to be something she just isn't. But she's not a kid anymore and I have to stop worrying too much about others... She is supposed to know what she is doing.
I've been exchanging emails with four new girls; one Singaporean with Indian background, two Russians (!) and one Latvian (!!!). Is this going to lead anywhere? I don't know. Who can tell?
Saturday 26 July 2003
Speaking of the devil...
I was in bed reading. Sergei Prokofiev playing on the office. Not too loud, of course. Not at this time. 1:25am my mobile plays the SMS alert. It was J saying:
"Hi. How are you? Just sending you a hug, kisses and love. J"
How do I cope with that?
"Hi. How are you? Just sending you a hug, kisses and love. J"
How do I cope with that?
Trading six for half a dozen
I’ve been spending time with Noor. We met on Monday, watched the new Tomb Raider movie on Wednesday, had dinner yesterday and today she followed me to an Aikido dojo and then home for another DVD session. She’s nice but I am beginning to get bothered by a few things.
For example, we met several times this week and if it depended on her, we would have spent even more time together, meaning ‘every day’. I certainly enjoy the company but I need my own time to do my own things in my own pace, whenever I want. And though she will say “oh, yes, I do not want to interfere with your work or private time, honey” such statement will soon be followed by the question “so, what are you doing tomorrow? Can we meet again?”.
And all this comes after a long chat on Wednesday. That day, after the movie, I made an attempt to make it clear she’s going too fast, in my opinion, a sure way to have a heartache later. Relationship is a mutual thing, I’ve been learning. When one is not in the same pace as the other, things are bound to go wrong. As they did with the girl ‘whose eyes punched holes in my soul’. You do remember, don’t you? She never wrote again. I scared the poor thing away.
It makes me think: J used to complain I did not have time for her; quite an unfair statement as we were always going out for movies, dinners and/or other activities. If Noor, not even a girlfriend yet, already feels ‘neglected’ in spite of all the time we spent together during the past few weeks, where is this going to lead? This is, as we say in my country, “trading six for half a dozen”.
All these frustrated relationships make me think a lot about J. Every time something goes wrong, I think about her and how much we had in common. I guess this ‘behaviour’ will only stop when I fall in love again. But till then, how do I avoid it? And the fact she keeps sending me messages doesn’t help either. Which is, as I mentioned, exactly what she wants. She’s smart, that girl.
She replied to my email. The last one. My reply to hers. I knew it was a bad move to reply, I knew it! So, she came back with the sweetest message, so apologetic, saying she didn’t really mean the things she said. It was just that she cares and lately I have been on her mind a lot (oops! Am I to blame?).
So… My dearest friend in the Philippines says J is the one for me. I have to avoid meeting my uncle online because he always asks “Are you back with J yet? No?!? Give the girl another chance…”. My love life is getting nowhere. My sex life sucks (not literally, unfortunately). And I am not getting any younger. Will I get to my 40s alone? Shoo, shoo – scary thought! Will someone help, please? I am getting very vulnerable here. If J calls, I will have to hang up on her! I am getting very easy to convince and she always has the right speech and arguments for coming back. That would be a really bad move…
For example, we met several times this week and if it depended on her, we would have spent even more time together, meaning ‘every day’. I certainly enjoy the company but I need my own time to do my own things in my own pace, whenever I want. And though she will say “oh, yes, I do not want to interfere with your work or private time, honey” such statement will soon be followed by the question “so, what are you doing tomorrow? Can we meet again?”.
And all this comes after a long chat on Wednesday. That day, after the movie, I made an attempt to make it clear she’s going too fast, in my opinion, a sure way to have a heartache later. Relationship is a mutual thing, I’ve been learning. When one is not in the same pace as the other, things are bound to go wrong. As they did with the girl ‘whose eyes punched holes in my soul’. You do remember, don’t you? She never wrote again. I scared the poor thing away.
It makes me think: J used to complain I did not have time for her; quite an unfair statement as we were always going out for movies, dinners and/or other activities. If Noor, not even a girlfriend yet, already feels ‘neglected’ in spite of all the time we spent together during the past few weeks, where is this going to lead? This is, as we say in my country, “trading six for half a dozen”.
All these frustrated relationships make me think a lot about J. Every time something goes wrong, I think about her and how much we had in common. I guess this ‘behaviour’ will only stop when I fall in love again. But till then, how do I avoid it? And the fact she keeps sending me messages doesn’t help either. Which is, as I mentioned, exactly what she wants. She’s smart, that girl.
She replied to my email. The last one. My reply to hers. I knew it was a bad move to reply, I knew it! So, she came back with the sweetest message, so apologetic, saying she didn’t really mean the things she said. It was just that she cares and lately I have been on her mind a lot (oops! Am I to blame?).
So… My dearest friend in the Philippines says J is the one for me. I have to avoid meeting my uncle online because he always asks “Are you back with J yet? No?!? Give the girl another chance…”. My love life is getting nowhere. My sex life sucks (not literally, unfortunately). And I am not getting any younger. Will I get to my 40s alone? Shoo, shoo – scary thought! Will someone help, please? I am getting very vulnerable here. If J calls, I will have to hang up on her! I am getting very easy to convince and she always has the right speech and arguments for coming back. That would be a really bad move…
Tuesday 22 July 2003
Other people’s problems…
… are so much easier to solve, aren’t they? When you are looking from outside you get a better picture of the entire situation and you have a better understanding of the matter. You can analyse things better and decisions are done based on reasoning, not on emotions. The only problem is, for those inside, whatever you suggest will always be ‘easier said than done’.
J sent me an email a couple of days ago. Sunday, Monday, I do not remember and it doesn’t really matter. She started by saying “I have to apologise for my rudeness” and then complained about how I never send her emails or call. She said I do not treasure the years we spent together and just totally forgot about her, as if she was a toy I was tired of playing with.
Now, that is new… After all she has done, after all we’ve been through, she is saying I do not treasure what we had. Human beings never cease to amaze me. She said the reason she wanted me to keep contact is because she ‘worries’ about me and wants me to be happy. Yeah, right… Let’s put things into perspective and chance her speech a bit. She is not happy, her life is going no where and she wants to know if I am in the same situation. That sounds more like it, yeah.
She even said that if I do not want any contact, as far as she is concerned, I can “drop dead”. That one made me laugh and also proud of her because she was actually writing in English! She certainly got a lot of vocabulary. When she came to Singapore her English skills were so limited she couldn’t even ask for direction. Ha!
But well, I wrote her back. I usually do. I mean, if I get a message, I do not mind replying. So I did. And I told her, in a very nice way (honestly) that I did not know why she was complaining. Every time she writes, I write back. Just recently I chatted with her online. I have been having more contact with her than with my ex-wife. What is it that she wants from me? Rhetoric question, in fact, because I know what she wants…
But the reason I mention this is, I have been telling people to move on with their lives, let go of frustrated relationships that are getting nowhere, and yet, I don’t seem to listen to my own advice. Yes, I have been trying to let go and meeting new people and all. But now I think, why did I even bother to reply to her email? I could have simply deleted it. Would it make any difference? She said I could drop dead, right? Why not let her think I did? When I replied to her, I gave her reasons to write again thus perpetuating this broken relationship that doesn’t seem to die. It’s a bloody ‘moto continuo’.
I mentioned before and it’s pretty obvious I do not hate her. I wish her all good things in life and I really care for her. I wouldn’t mind helping if she needed and I would be glad to attend to her wedding, should she find a nice guy who loved and respected her and that she loved and respected in return. I would do it. Seriously. It would be one of those moments when you cannot precise whether the tears rolling down your face are from happiness and pain, but I would be there, smiling to her.
But then, for that to happen, *we* must let go. Though it is, as I said, ‘easier said than done’… But I am getting there. Yes, sir, I am. I just have to be careful not to fall in temptation, because that would be deadly and things would get back to the way they were in no time. Can I possibly take any more?
It scares me to think I actually can… (sighs)
J sent me an email a couple of days ago. Sunday, Monday, I do not remember and it doesn’t really matter. She started by saying “I have to apologise for my rudeness” and then complained about how I never send her emails or call. She said I do not treasure the years we spent together and just totally forgot about her, as if she was a toy I was tired of playing with.
Now, that is new… After all she has done, after all we’ve been through, she is saying I do not treasure what we had. Human beings never cease to amaze me. She said the reason she wanted me to keep contact is because she ‘worries’ about me and wants me to be happy. Yeah, right… Let’s put things into perspective and chance her speech a bit. She is not happy, her life is going no where and she wants to know if I am in the same situation. That sounds more like it, yeah.
She even said that if I do not want any contact, as far as she is concerned, I can “drop dead”. That one made me laugh and also proud of her because she was actually writing in English! She certainly got a lot of vocabulary. When she came to Singapore her English skills were so limited she couldn’t even ask for direction. Ha!
But well, I wrote her back. I usually do. I mean, if I get a message, I do not mind replying. So I did. And I told her, in a very nice way (honestly) that I did not know why she was complaining. Every time she writes, I write back. Just recently I chatted with her online. I have been having more contact with her than with my ex-wife. What is it that she wants from me? Rhetoric question, in fact, because I know what she wants…
But the reason I mention this is, I have been telling people to move on with their lives, let go of frustrated relationships that are getting nowhere, and yet, I don’t seem to listen to my own advice. Yes, I have been trying to let go and meeting new people and all. But now I think, why did I even bother to reply to her email? I could have simply deleted it. Would it make any difference? She said I could drop dead, right? Why not let her think I did? When I replied to her, I gave her reasons to write again thus perpetuating this broken relationship that doesn’t seem to die. It’s a bloody ‘moto continuo’.
I mentioned before and it’s pretty obvious I do not hate her. I wish her all good things in life and I really care for her. I wouldn’t mind helping if she needed and I would be glad to attend to her wedding, should she find a nice guy who loved and respected her and that she loved and respected in return. I would do it. Seriously. It would be one of those moments when you cannot precise whether the tears rolling down your face are from happiness and pain, but I would be there, smiling to her.
But then, for that to happen, *we* must let go. Though it is, as I said, ‘easier said than done’… But I am getting there. Yes, sir, I am. I just have to be careful not to fall in temptation, because that would be deadly and things would get back to the way they were in no time. Can I possibly take any more?
It scares me to think I actually can… (sighs)
Sunday 20 July 2003
And the river runs through it...
I met Noor last Thursday. Quite a nice person. Sweet, easy to talk to, light-hearted, fun to be with… The chemistry was nice and so, the plans for the DVD marathon on Saturday were kept. On Saturday, she came a bit late. The appointment was at 2:00pm and by 2:20 I was already wondering if she had stood me up. But that was not the case. She arrived 2:30 and we had a nice time chatting and watching movies.
It was nice to have someone with me at home. It’s been a long time since it happened last. It also gave me the incentive I needed to tidy up the place a little. The mess was getting out of hand, I must confess. I am not exactly organized but I do keep my place in order. I might have mentioned I believe your house, your desk at the office, your ‘environment’ reflects your mind. If they are messy, well, that does say something about you.
It took me a while to actually sort out old receipts, throw away old magazines and news papers, put computer cables and parts in their places etc but it was worth it. When she arrived, the house looked presentable again. And even my bed had the two sides free. Not that I was planning to drag the girl to bed, not that. Well, at least not yet anyway (grin). But since J went away, I don’t know if it just happened or if I did it on purpose, her side of the bed was taken by books and folded clothes I bring back from the trips. Maybe it was a way to have ‘something’ beside me when I sleep. A way to make the bed not ‘so big’… Maybe. I don’t know.
She came to the apartment, we watched some movies, ate pop corn, talked, held hand, hugged, kissed… And went out for dinner before getting to intimate. I was feeling a bit shy. Probably because I do not know how to behave with her. I mean, being a Muslim girl and all, I really don’t know what is appropriate or not. And I don’t want her to think I am a pervert. Well, I am, but not a rude pervert. Well, ok, maybe rude but not intentionally. Ok, ok, sometimes intentionally but not always! (Damn!!!)
So, I was just following her lead. Taking ‘her’ time instead of mine. However, after we said goodbye I was left with the feeling maybe I was being too naïve. Maybe she thought this “latin lover” thing was a myth. Hmph… Myself being naïve… That sounds so funny… Almost hard to believe.
It doesn’t matter, I had a good time. And I enjoyed the company. Now I just have to figure out what is really going on because deep in my heart I know she is not the one yet. So, is it bad to spend time together? Am I fooling her and making her believe there is a *us* planned for the future? Am I going too fast, risking breaking her heart or mine? Or am I going too slow? Should I talk to her and explain all this? Or just let it flow? Again, I don’t know. I hoped so much to find someone and now I am having second thoughts. Why? Geez, will I ever know what I want?
The problem is: J has been on my mind since we last spoke online. I’m not sure why. Now and then I find myself thinking about her. Why now? I really thought I was over her. Every time I think of her, I remember all the things that happened and she is put back into the “do not call” list, but why does she keep coming back to my thoughts in the first place? Is my heart still with her?
A very good friend in the Philippines sent me this email saying that she honestly believed J was still the one for me. I respect and love her very much and as I read that, I knew she was telling me something no one else would. She was being honest with me, giving me her point of view about all that is happening in my life. She is a true friend. She worries and always sends me emails, which I seldom reply, but she never gives up on me (May, if you ever read this, thank you for being there. I love you dearly and I wish you ‘enough’!).
Enough of writing. I am tired and confused. I can’t concentrate anymore.
I might be going to the movies tomorrow with Noor, and maybe we’ll have a serious talk about our expectations on the relationship afterwards. Or maybe not. I don’t know. I know nothing…
It was nice to have someone with me at home. It’s been a long time since it happened last. It also gave me the incentive I needed to tidy up the place a little. The mess was getting out of hand, I must confess. I am not exactly organized but I do keep my place in order. I might have mentioned I believe your house, your desk at the office, your ‘environment’ reflects your mind. If they are messy, well, that does say something about you.
It took me a while to actually sort out old receipts, throw away old magazines and news papers, put computer cables and parts in their places etc but it was worth it. When she arrived, the house looked presentable again. And even my bed had the two sides free. Not that I was planning to drag the girl to bed, not that. Well, at least not yet anyway (grin). But since J went away, I don’t know if it just happened or if I did it on purpose, her side of the bed was taken by books and folded clothes I bring back from the trips. Maybe it was a way to have ‘something’ beside me when I sleep. A way to make the bed not ‘so big’… Maybe. I don’t know.
She came to the apartment, we watched some movies, ate pop corn, talked, held hand, hugged, kissed… And went out for dinner before getting to intimate. I was feeling a bit shy. Probably because I do not know how to behave with her. I mean, being a Muslim girl and all, I really don’t know what is appropriate or not. And I don’t want her to think I am a pervert. Well, I am, but not a rude pervert. Well, ok, maybe rude but not intentionally. Ok, ok, sometimes intentionally but not always! (Damn!!!)
So, I was just following her lead. Taking ‘her’ time instead of mine. However, after we said goodbye I was left with the feeling maybe I was being too naïve. Maybe she thought this “latin lover” thing was a myth. Hmph… Myself being naïve… That sounds so funny… Almost hard to believe.
It doesn’t matter, I had a good time. And I enjoyed the company. Now I just have to figure out what is really going on because deep in my heart I know she is not the one yet. So, is it bad to spend time together? Am I fooling her and making her believe there is a *us* planned for the future? Am I going too fast, risking breaking her heart or mine? Or am I going too slow? Should I talk to her and explain all this? Or just let it flow? Again, I don’t know. I hoped so much to find someone and now I am having second thoughts. Why? Geez, will I ever know what I want?
The problem is: J has been on my mind since we last spoke online. I’m not sure why. Now and then I find myself thinking about her. Why now? I really thought I was over her. Every time I think of her, I remember all the things that happened and she is put back into the “do not call” list, but why does she keep coming back to my thoughts in the first place? Is my heart still with her?
A very good friend in the Philippines sent me this email saying that she honestly believed J was still the one for me. I respect and love her very much and as I read that, I knew she was telling me something no one else would. She was being honest with me, giving me her point of view about all that is happening in my life. She is a true friend. She worries and always sends me emails, which I seldom reply, but she never gives up on me (May, if you ever read this, thank you for being there. I love you dearly and I wish you ‘enough’!).
Enough of writing. I am tired and confused. I can’t concentrate anymore.
I might be going to the movies tomorrow with Noor, and maybe we’ll have a serious talk about our expectations on the relationship afterwards. Or maybe not. I don’t know. I know nothing…
Thursday 17 July 2003
Timing, is it?
It was in the papers a couple of years ago. A mother killed her one month baby by asphyxiations with a pillow. She had been a rape victim and the baby was the result. She was charged, convicted and sentenced to life in prison. Jurors and judge had no mercy. They lectured her on how could she be so cruel and cold blooded to harm an innocent and defenseless child.
Amazingly enough, on the same state abortion is legal. Had she committed the crime half an year earlier, not only she would have been free, but also would have had help from a team of surgeons for the procedure and psychologists to help cope with the depression.
As I see it, it would have been murder just the same. For them, abortion is a choice for modern independent women who take control of their lives and destiny.
So... Is it really just a matter of timing?
...
Remember I mentioned the Thai sisters were calling again? Phrang sent me a message asking if I could lend her money so she could go see her daughter. A daughter I never new she had. She sounded really desperate. The amount? 25,000 Baht. Around 1,500$ dollars.
Let's think for a moment, shall we? The flight ticket from Bangkok to Chiang Rae, all the way to the north of the country, costs 2000 Baht. The international flight from Singapore to Bangkok is around 400$ dollars, less than 10,000 Baht. Where the heck is this child of hers she so desperately wants to visit?
I sent her sister an SMS saying: "Don't let your sister kill the baby. She might die in the process...". She called 20 seconds later.
- How do you know? She's five months pregnant...
Good question, Tok. How do I know? Well, as I usually say, what I don't know, the Devil will tell me...
Amazingly enough, on the same state abortion is legal. Had she committed the crime half an year earlier, not only she would have been free, but also would have had help from a team of surgeons for the procedure and psychologists to help cope with the depression.
As I see it, it would have been murder just the same. For them, abortion is a choice for modern independent women who take control of their lives and destiny.
So... Is it really just a matter of timing?
...
Remember I mentioned the Thai sisters were calling again? Phrang sent me a message asking if I could lend her money so she could go see her daughter. A daughter I never new she had. She sounded really desperate. The amount? 25,000 Baht. Around 1,500$ dollars.
Let's think for a moment, shall we? The flight ticket from Bangkok to Chiang Rae, all the way to the north of the country, costs 2000 Baht. The international flight from Singapore to Bangkok is around 400$ dollars, less than 10,000 Baht. Where the heck is this child of hers she so desperately wants to visit?
I sent her sister an SMS saying: "Don't let your sister kill the baby. She might die in the process...". She called 20 seconds later.
- How do you know? She's five months pregnant...
Good question, Tok. How do I know? Well, as I usually say, what I don't know, the Devil will tell me...
Wednesday 16 July 2003
How to make an entire country look silly
Singapore and Malaysia have always had their differences. It's part of Singapore's history. I am neither historian nor expert; hell, I've been here for only 3 years. It's hardly time enough for you to know the country even if you do study its history. But some things you do realize in that time.
Singapore, being an island as you know, was once a Malay territory. And I've been told it became independent because at certain point in time the Malays said "Hmmm... There are way too many Chinese in that island...". Chinese are not Muslims and they have their own way of behaving, you know. So it made sense to come to a friendly agreement and just "politically expel" them.
That's what they did. They made sure they had a good deal by ensuring land and jobs and opportunities would still be granted for them and "expelled" that "annoying" little thing.
Well, but as I said, the Chinese have their ways and I'm willing to bet Malays never expected such a small piece of land with barely any natural resources to become so rich.
If you cross the bridge to Malaysia (built by Singapore) and have a look at Johor Baruh, first city after the immigration, what you will see resembles what Singapore used to be in the 70's, shortly after the independence treat. It becomes obvious that Singapore underwent a huge renovation while Malaysia, well... Didn't!
Still today, based on the treaty that was so unilateral, Malays have their interests protected in Singapore. They will have benefits no other race in Singapore will have. For example, by law, a certain percentage of apartments in HDB flats (economic dwellings created by the government) must be available to Malay buyers at a discounted price. It doesn't matter if there are buyers or not. If there aren't, those units are to be available just the same.
There are lots of other situations and cases where Malays are protected or simply benefit from the law but I'm getting off track too much, diverting from the topic. The important thing to know is: Malays have all benefits and still complain.
It's like having a healthy male adult complaining he is being abused or taken advantage of by a 6 month baby girl.
The latest case and reason for the post is the 'water issue'. It's been in the papers and sounds so absurd it borders the ridiculous. Singapore has no water resources. The agreement set the price of the water supplied by Malaysia. There was a date when the price was to be reviewed and adjusted. Malaysia 'forgot' about it and missed the date. When they realized it, they came complaining. Singapore agreed to review the price despite the inefficiency of the Malay government. The price doubled.
Two years later, way before the next adjustment date, Malaysia started complaining again. Singapore ceded and a new adjustment was made. Another couple of years passed and guess what? Yep, Malays came whining again. Now they are advertising in every paper that Singapore had an enormous profit on re-selling the water they bought so cheap and that this is not fair. The latest I read even mentioned that "each Singaporean would have to pay only a couple of cents, less then a bite of a Big Mac, for an entire year supply of water".
Don't this people realize they are making a mockery of themselves? Check the news on both Singaporean and Malaysean papers, the "Straits Times" and "The New Straits Times" respectively.
Singapore, being an island as you know, was once a Malay territory. And I've been told it became independent because at certain point in time the Malays said "Hmmm... There are way too many Chinese in that island...". Chinese are not Muslims and they have their own way of behaving, you know. So it made sense to come to a friendly agreement and just "politically expel" them.
That's what they did. They made sure they had a good deal by ensuring land and jobs and opportunities would still be granted for them and "expelled" that "annoying" little thing.
Well, but as I said, the Chinese have their ways and I'm willing to bet Malays never expected such a small piece of land with barely any natural resources to become so rich.
If you cross the bridge to Malaysia (built by Singapore) and have a look at Johor Baruh, first city after the immigration, what you will see resembles what Singapore used to be in the 70's, shortly after the independence treat. It becomes obvious that Singapore underwent a huge renovation while Malaysia, well... Didn't!
Still today, based on the treaty that was so unilateral, Malays have their interests protected in Singapore. They will have benefits no other race in Singapore will have. For example, by law, a certain percentage of apartments in HDB flats (economic dwellings created by the government) must be available to Malay buyers at a discounted price. It doesn't matter if there are buyers or not. If there aren't, those units are to be available just the same.
There are lots of other situations and cases where Malays are protected or simply benefit from the law but I'm getting off track too much, diverting from the topic. The important thing to know is: Malays have all benefits and still complain.
It's like having a healthy male adult complaining he is being abused or taken advantage of by a 6 month baby girl.
The latest case and reason for the post is the 'water issue'. It's been in the papers and sounds so absurd it borders the ridiculous. Singapore has no water resources. The agreement set the price of the water supplied by Malaysia. There was a date when the price was to be reviewed and adjusted. Malaysia 'forgot' about it and missed the date. When they realized it, they came complaining. Singapore agreed to review the price despite the inefficiency of the Malay government. The price doubled.
Two years later, way before the next adjustment date, Malaysia started complaining again. Singapore ceded and a new adjustment was made. Another couple of years passed and guess what? Yep, Malays came whining again. Now they are advertising in every paper that Singapore had an enormous profit on re-selling the water they bought so cheap and that this is not fair. The latest I read even mentioned that "each Singaporean would have to pay only a couple of cents, less then a bite of a Big Mac, for an entire year supply of water".
Don't this people realize they are making a mockery of themselves? Check the news on both Singaporean and Malaysean papers, the "Straits Times" and "The New Straits Times" respectively.
At the airport
Woohoo!!! Going home early. I am actually wait-listed for two flights later today. My confirmed flight is only tomorrow at 10:00am. However, Rajan (the limousine driver) got me queue numbers at the airport and I think I'll manage to go back.
Noor sounded happy I am going back earlier. Maybe we can meet later today? Who knows? It would be great, wouldn't it?
Noor sounded happy I am going back earlier. Maybe we can meet later today? Who knows? It would be great, wouldn't it?
Tuesday 15 July 2003
Busy long days
This trip to Malaysia was fruitful. Yesterday morning we had a good meeting with Roche Malaysia and in the afternoon at another customer's site I managed to solve pending issues regarding reporting. My colleague, the Sales Director who needed my help seemed to be happy with the results.
Throughout the day, every hour or so, I would be taking quick breaks to SMS Noor, my new online friend. I'm not ashamed to admit: I am infatuated. And she seems to be too, which is good. We have been talking a lot, either via SMS or Instant Messenger and we get along fine, despite our so different cultural background.
This is a lesson I needed. She's muslim and with all the ignorance about their religion, I am faced with the opportunity to learn more.
I invited her for dinner followed by a DVD session in my place and she accepted. Dinner will be tomorrow and the DVD session is to be settled during dinner. Oh, boy... I am looking forward to it. If the chemistry is right in person as it has been over the net, we will both have solved our loneliness problems.
Throughout the day, every hour or so, I would be taking quick breaks to SMS Noor, my new online friend. I'm not ashamed to admit: I am infatuated. And she seems to be too, which is good. We have been talking a lot, either via SMS or Instant Messenger and we get along fine, despite our so different cultural background.
This is a lesson I needed. She's muslim and with all the ignorance about their religion, I am faced with the opportunity to learn more.
I invited her for dinner followed by a DVD session in my place and she accepted. Dinner will be tomorrow and the DVD session is to be settled during dinner. Oh, boy... I am looking forward to it. If the chemistry is right in person as it has been over the net, we will both have solved our loneliness problems.
Monday 14 July 2003
Someone unexpected
I forgot to mention, I received an email in reply to my web personals ad. Singaporean girl. So far she has been very interesting, sweet and understanding. We exchanged a couple of messages by email, then moved to Instant Messenger and now, we exchange SMSs.
She is so kind when talking to me it makes it difficult not to be drawn to her. But then again, I am always so starved for attention it's hard to tell what's real from what my mind and needy heart want to be real. And though I keep telling myself to take it slowly (I barely know her) I find myself willing to talk to her every chance I got.
Oh, boy... I'm pathetic, I know...
She is so kind when talking to me it makes it difficult not to be drawn to her. But then again, I am always so starved for attention it's hard to tell what's real from what my mind and needy heart want to be real. And though I keep telling myself to take it slowly (I barely know her) I find myself willing to talk to her every chance I got.
Oh, boy... I'm pathetic, I know...
Here we go again
SQ118 to Kuala Lumpur: 22 minutes delayed. Do I care? Not so sure anymore. If entire populations get used with being abused by corrupt governors, countless wives get used with their husbands physical assaults, numerous children get used with not having a proper meal at least once a day... Should I care if the bloody plane is 20+ minutes late?
The answer is: Yes! I should!!!
Because I cannot to be responsible for what happens to others but I can certainly try to fix things that happen to me. As much as I would love to, I cannot solve the world's problems. If I could snap my fingers and guarantee every kid is well fed, every household is peaceful and every country has a fair prosperous government, believe me, I would have done it long ago. Unfortunately, this is not how the story goes and the best I can do with my limited powers is try to solve my own personal conflicts, in my own personal space, hoping others will do the same.
The answer is: Yes! I should!!!
Because I cannot to be responsible for what happens to others but I can certainly try to fix things that happen to me. As much as I would love to, I cannot solve the world's problems. If I could snap my fingers and guarantee every kid is well fed, every household is peaceful and every country has a fair prosperous government, believe me, I would have done it long ago. Unfortunately, this is not how the story goes and the best I can do with my limited powers is try to solve my own personal conflicts, in my own personal space, hoping others will do the same.
Sunday 13 July 2003
Who are they?
Your friends, who are they? Your real friends. Family doesn’t count and don’t come to me with stories of how good your relationship is with your father, mother, brother, sister or anyone who shares the same last name or is somehow blood related. Go ahead, count them. Got a number? Ok, now let me tell you this:
If you think your friends are the ones that have so much in common with you, who will agree with you in all things and all the time, boy I’m telling you, you’re in for a big surprise. It might sound funny after what’s been said in the first paragraph but, you’re real friends are just like your family. They will fight you, argue with you, disagree, from time to time even upset you but the important thing is they are there for you. In your darkest hour, when everyone else turns away from you, they will be there. They will tell you to your face “You really screwed up this time!” just to complement with “Let’s see how *WE* solve this mess.”
For them, there is no wrong time, there are no ‘buts’, nothing is too much or too difficult. They will be there for you. They will tell you what you need to hear when no one else has the guts to do it, even when they know you’re not going to like it. As someone said recently, they are like bitter medication. They are the family you get to choose. So, choose carefully.
I can count on the fingers of one hand the friends, real friends, I have. And though I wish I had more, I know it’s not that easy. Good friends just don’t ‘happen’. They cannot be bought and cannot be made in a couple of weeks.
Now, that said. Who are they? Your real friends. Count again…
And to my friends who might be reading: Guys, thank you ever so much.
…
It was 2:15am and I had just put my instant messenger on “away” mode. As soon as I switched off the lights I heard the usual sound of incoming message. I was really tired but you know how these things are, right? Wouldn’t hurt to check the mailbox one more time, wouldn’t hurt see who was calling. Wanna take a guess?
J. It was her. The message was simply “you there?”. Well, I could, or perhaps should, have pretended not to see. Next morning I would just send an offline message saying “Sorry! I wasn’t”. But that would be so mean. And honestly, it’s not like I hate her and never want to hear from her again. How could I possibly? I spent 4 years with her. I learned a lot from her and owe her a lot too. If the thought of avoiding her crossed my mind, it’s just due to the realization that we are not meant to be together. So, why insist?
Anyway, the heart gave in, the brain was already halfway asleep, so I ‘chatted’ a bit. All the usual stuff: “How are you? How’s work? Have you been travelling? You haven’t sent me my post cards.”… So on and so forth. Nothing ever changes. I could feel she was very meticulously trying not to scare me away by saying something stupid while steering the conversation towards her real goals, whatever they were. Confirmation came when she asked “But, honestly, how are things with you?”.
I know her too well, you know? It’s a side effect of intimacy. The real question behind the question was “Have you found a girlfriend yet?” or “Are you still alone and maybe unhappy?”. You know where this was going to get, right? I had too much of that already. Providence come to rescue me by dropping her connection (may God bless dial-ups) before I could reply. So I set my IM to “away” again and headed bed without looking back.
This morning there was an email from her sister in my mail box. It said:
“Hi, how are you. When are you coming back to visit? We all miss you very much. Sorry, the line dropped. J is asking you to call her. Love, Fa.”
I didn’t. And life goes on…
If you think your friends are the ones that have so much in common with you, who will agree with you in all things and all the time, boy I’m telling you, you’re in for a big surprise. It might sound funny after what’s been said in the first paragraph but, you’re real friends are just like your family. They will fight you, argue with you, disagree, from time to time even upset you but the important thing is they are there for you. In your darkest hour, when everyone else turns away from you, they will be there. They will tell you to your face “You really screwed up this time!” just to complement with “Let’s see how *WE* solve this mess.”
For them, there is no wrong time, there are no ‘buts’, nothing is too much or too difficult. They will be there for you. They will tell you what you need to hear when no one else has the guts to do it, even when they know you’re not going to like it. As someone said recently, they are like bitter medication. They are the family you get to choose. So, choose carefully.
I can count on the fingers of one hand the friends, real friends, I have. And though I wish I had more, I know it’s not that easy. Good friends just don’t ‘happen’. They cannot be bought and cannot be made in a couple of weeks.
Now, that said. Who are they? Your real friends. Count again…
And to my friends who might be reading: Guys, thank you ever so much.
…
It was 2:15am and I had just put my instant messenger on “away” mode. As soon as I switched off the lights I heard the usual sound of incoming message. I was really tired but you know how these things are, right? Wouldn’t hurt to check the mailbox one more time, wouldn’t hurt see who was calling. Wanna take a guess?
J. It was her. The message was simply “you there?”. Well, I could, or perhaps should, have pretended not to see. Next morning I would just send an offline message saying “Sorry! I wasn’t”. But that would be so mean. And honestly, it’s not like I hate her and never want to hear from her again. How could I possibly? I spent 4 years with her. I learned a lot from her and owe her a lot too. If the thought of avoiding her crossed my mind, it’s just due to the realization that we are not meant to be together. So, why insist?
Anyway, the heart gave in, the brain was already halfway asleep, so I ‘chatted’ a bit. All the usual stuff: “How are you? How’s work? Have you been travelling? You haven’t sent me my post cards.”… So on and so forth. Nothing ever changes. I could feel she was very meticulously trying not to scare me away by saying something stupid while steering the conversation towards her real goals, whatever they were. Confirmation came when she asked “But, honestly, how are things with you?”.
I know her too well, you know? It’s a side effect of intimacy. The real question behind the question was “Have you found a girlfriend yet?” or “Are you still alone and maybe unhappy?”. You know where this was going to get, right? I had too much of that already. Providence come to rescue me by dropping her connection (may God bless dial-ups) before I could reply. So I set my IM to “away” again and headed bed without looking back.
This morning there was an email from her sister in my mail box. It said:
“Hi, how are you. When are you coming back to visit? We all miss you very much. Sorry, the line dropped. J is asking you to call her. Love, Fa.”
I didn’t. And life goes on…
Thursday 10 July 2003
You are all going to die down here!
Or so said the Red Queen!
And I say: Yeah, Sweetie; Now tell me something I do not know! Because, as far as I know, I’ve been dying since the day I was born. Now, it’s just a matter of counting days and trying hard to make the most out of them.
And I mentioned before, another 15 years should be enough to see my son a grown up, well educated man, living and leading his own life. As of now, this is all that really matters. Unless of course, I manage to find my soul mate, who will sweep me off my feet and bring me back to life. Make me believe in love again. That would be nice, but I’m beginning to think it’s unlikely.
Let’s see... I had an argument with Melody. I was already disappointed with her and her way of dealing with things, but still regarded her as a friend. Then she called, gave me that “Oh, I love you so much” speech and asked me to call back next day. Soft-hearted and needy as I am right now, I fell for it. I started thinking maybe I was being too inconsiderate with her situation and perhaps I should be more understanding. Given the fact I am supposed to go back to the Philippines in a couple of weeks, I started nurturing the idea of having a serious conversation with her and, who knows, give it a try.
Well, that thought did not last long. She had a sudden jealousy attack, triggered by a comment I sent her via SMS, and avoided my calls for two days. I did not know what was happening. Honestly, I thought maybe her mobile (a pre-paid one) had no credits or she had travelled to some remote area with no mobile coverage. But when I finally got through, I was greeted by a totally different person. Not by the same sweet girl who was making me everlasting love promises days before, but by a mean bitter and unaffectionate woman who did not care to listen to what I had to say. Well, fair enough. We did not have anything going before, we might as well keep it like that.
Koi, in Thailand, is still a doll. And still thinks I am a bloody ATM machine. What is wrong with these people!? She sent me an email explaining what happened with the money I had given her so she could make her passport. The passport is yet to be issued but just a couple of days ago she said she had to send money to her parents and asked if I could help. It broke my heart to say no. But I was already hurting when she asked. Nothing ever changes...
The sisters are calling again. I deserve it! They probably know Koi and I are not doing so fine after all. I am a prey at large. “Look! The ‘jai dee’ foreigner is free again!” Is it worth it? I’m afraid not.
Ok, so – as the sales guys would say – what’s in the pipeline? Erm... Nothing! There’s nothing in the pipeline. No one. Not a single soul. Right now, I am waiting for Lord Almighty to have mercy on me and give me some pointers, cause I really do not know where to look anymore.
And I just realized: I am like wine! With age, I am getting… Bitter!
And I say: Yeah, Sweetie; Now tell me something I do not know! Because, as far as I know, I’ve been dying since the day I was born. Now, it’s just a matter of counting days and trying hard to make the most out of them.
And I mentioned before, another 15 years should be enough to see my son a grown up, well educated man, living and leading his own life. As of now, this is all that really matters. Unless of course, I manage to find my soul mate, who will sweep me off my feet and bring me back to life. Make me believe in love again. That would be nice, but I’m beginning to think it’s unlikely.
Let’s see... I had an argument with Melody. I was already disappointed with her and her way of dealing with things, but still regarded her as a friend. Then she called, gave me that “Oh, I love you so much” speech and asked me to call back next day. Soft-hearted and needy as I am right now, I fell for it. I started thinking maybe I was being too inconsiderate with her situation and perhaps I should be more understanding. Given the fact I am supposed to go back to the Philippines in a couple of weeks, I started nurturing the idea of having a serious conversation with her and, who knows, give it a try.
Well, that thought did not last long. She had a sudden jealousy attack, triggered by a comment I sent her via SMS, and avoided my calls for two days. I did not know what was happening. Honestly, I thought maybe her mobile (a pre-paid one) had no credits or she had travelled to some remote area with no mobile coverage. But when I finally got through, I was greeted by a totally different person. Not by the same sweet girl who was making me everlasting love promises days before, but by a mean bitter and unaffectionate woman who did not care to listen to what I had to say. Well, fair enough. We did not have anything going before, we might as well keep it like that.
Koi, in Thailand, is still a doll. And still thinks I am a bloody ATM machine. What is wrong with these people!? She sent me an email explaining what happened with the money I had given her so she could make her passport. The passport is yet to be issued but just a couple of days ago she said she had to send money to her parents and asked if I could help. It broke my heart to say no. But I was already hurting when she asked. Nothing ever changes...
The sisters are calling again. I deserve it! They probably know Koi and I are not doing so fine after all. I am a prey at large. “Look! The ‘jai dee’ foreigner is free again!” Is it worth it? I’m afraid not.
Ok, so – as the sales guys would say – what’s in the pipeline? Erm... Nothing! There’s nothing in the pipeline. No one. Not a single soul. Right now, I am waiting for Lord Almighty to have mercy on me and give me some pointers, cause I really do not know where to look anymore.
And I just realized: I am like wine! With age, I am getting… Bitter!
Sunday 6 July 2003
Wherever you are...
And I know you are out there somewhere; please listen to me. I’ve been trying to find you without any success. I’ve been looking in the wrong places. I’ve been meeting the wrong people. I’ve been wasting time, sometimes losing focus. And I am getting weary. So, please hear my plea. If you’re looking for me too, please do not give up. We will meet, I am sure. But I am counting on you for help. Maybe you are more resourceful than I am. Maybe you are more focused. Maybe you are stronger. Do not give up on me, please. Please.
The Empty House Syndrome
It’s wonderful to have successfully finished this first phase of my project in Malaysia. And it certainly feels good to be back home and knowing I’ll be in for the week. However, the thought of ‘going home’ to no one still upset me. When J was around and I could not take her travelling with me, it was reassuring to know she would be home when I arrived. It was always nice. We would stay away for a couple of days and upon my return she would be the sweetest person. She would greet me at the door with a big smile, help me unpacking, ask me about the trip, those things... It was nice...
Now, I come home to an empty apartment. No one to talk to. No one waiting for me. Just the furniture and my own personal chaos: piles of paid bills and receipts, CDs and DVDs, small money from different countries and lots of computer parts and manuals. Nothing that could give me the warm feeling of being home again.
So, after I finished part of the unpacking yesterday, I inserted a DVD into the player and sat down on the sofa, a can of diet coke in one hand, the remote control in the other... On the big screen, Shakira, MTV Unplugged show started. I bought it by mistake. I thought it was the “Laundry Service” show, her latest. But no problem, I like Shakira since the first released album. The songs on this DVD are those from the second, “Dónde están los ladrones?”. I knew I was going to enjoy it. What I didn’t know was that I was going to start crying after paying attention the lyrics. Good Lord! Why do I always cry?
Songs like ‘Moscas en la casa’, ‘Sombras de Ti’, ‘Inevitable’ and especially ‘Tú’ can only be written by someone who has experienced both love and lost. Check the lyrics at LyricsFreak.
Now, the big question is: was I missing company or missing *her* company? Hard to say. I guess a bit of both. I need to fall in love again... (sighs)
Now, I come home to an empty apartment. No one to talk to. No one waiting for me. Just the furniture and my own personal chaos: piles of paid bills and receipts, CDs and DVDs, small money from different countries and lots of computer parts and manuals. Nothing that could give me the warm feeling of being home again.
So, after I finished part of the unpacking yesterday, I inserted a DVD into the player and sat down on the sofa, a can of diet coke in one hand, the remote control in the other... On the big screen, Shakira, MTV Unplugged show started. I bought it by mistake. I thought it was the “Laundry Service” show, her latest. But no problem, I like Shakira since the first released album. The songs on this DVD are those from the second, “Dónde están los ladrones?”. I knew I was going to enjoy it. What I didn’t know was that I was going to start crying after paying attention the lyrics. Good Lord! Why do I always cry?
Songs like ‘Moscas en la casa’, ‘Sombras de Ti’, ‘Inevitable’ and especially ‘Tú’ can only be written by someone who has experienced both love and lost. Check the lyrics at LyricsFreak.
Now, the big question is: was I missing company or missing *her* company? Hard to say. I guess a bit of both. I need to fall in love again... (sighs)
Saturday 5 July 2003
When nice people behave not so nicely
For those who don't know, Singapore is a very controlled and organized country. To the point jokes will say it's a fine city: you'll get fined for almost anything, from chewing gum to not flushing the toilet. From speaking in public without a permit to feeding the birds in a park.
Though it might sound funny to some and too extreme to others, this approach ensures the country is clean and things work as expected. And while it's an annoyance to most, for me, coming from a country where anarchy is the rule not the exception, this strict way of running the country is a blessing.
You learn to live with these rules. And the moment they serve you in any way, you become glad they were there. The only problem is: you really get used to things done the proper way. You get used to abiding to the law. And when you feel something is not the way it's supposed to be, you resent it.
I do not have many complaints about life in Singapore. When asked if I like the place, I have no problem saying it's the second best country in the globe (Denmark still being the first). I have always been treated with respect and fairness here. But sometimes I catch myself thinking: are Singaporeans nice people by nature or because of the law?
Consider this: Every one knows you're not supposed to switch your mobile on while in the plane. Whether it is really dangerous is beyond the point. We’re told to have it switched off at all times while on board the aircraft. When the cabin crew says that repeatedly and in different languages, would you agree there is a reason for it? And if they say having the mobile on interferes with the plane's navigation system, wouldn't it be fair to at least give them the benefit of doubt and just have the bloody piece of equipment off?
Well, so it happens ever so frequently that, whenever arriving in Singapore, as soon as the plane has its wheels on the ground, people start switching on their phones. It's just plain stupid! Flight attendants will not allow you to answer the phone if it happens to ring. Besides, after you've been on a plane with your mobile off for two hours (or whatever amount of time, for that matter), what difference does it make if you switch it on 15 minutes after the touch down, when you are already outside, in the lounge?
On this last flight, this guy’s phone started ringing while the plane was still on it’s way to the gate. At first he pretended it wasn’t his. You know, that “Gold Fish” look on his face. Then, when the situation was unbearable, everyone else staring at him and the stewardess already approaching to lecture him, he switched it off without answering, all apologetic. What a clown.
Makes no sense to me... But, what the heck, I'm getting old and grumpy. Never mind me! Just the same, I’ll tell you more about ‘nice people behaving not so nicely’ some other time.
Though it might sound funny to some and too extreme to others, this approach ensures the country is clean and things work as expected. And while it's an annoyance to most, for me, coming from a country where anarchy is the rule not the exception, this strict way of running the country is a blessing.
You learn to live with these rules. And the moment they serve you in any way, you become glad they were there. The only problem is: you really get used to things done the proper way. You get used to abiding to the law. And when you feel something is not the way it's supposed to be, you resent it.
I do not have many complaints about life in Singapore. When asked if I like the place, I have no problem saying it's the second best country in the globe (Denmark still being the first). I have always been treated with respect and fairness here. But sometimes I catch myself thinking: are Singaporeans nice people by nature or because of the law?
Consider this: Every one knows you're not supposed to switch your mobile on while in the plane. Whether it is really dangerous is beyond the point. We’re told to have it switched off at all times while on board the aircraft. When the cabin crew says that repeatedly and in different languages, would you agree there is a reason for it? And if they say having the mobile on interferes with the plane's navigation system, wouldn't it be fair to at least give them the benefit of doubt and just have the bloody piece of equipment off?
Well, so it happens ever so frequently that, whenever arriving in Singapore, as soon as the plane has its wheels on the ground, people start switching on their phones. It's just plain stupid! Flight attendants will not allow you to answer the phone if it happens to ring. Besides, after you've been on a plane with your mobile off for two hours (or whatever amount of time, for that matter), what difference does it make if you switch it on 15 minutes after the touch down, when you are already outside, in the lounge?
On this last flight, this guy’s phone started ringing while the plane was still on it’s way to the gate. At first he pretended it wasn’t his. You know, that “Gold Fish” look on his face. Then, when the situation was unbearable, everyone else staring at him and the stewardess already approaching to lecture him, he switched it off without answering, all apologetic. What a clown.
Makes no sense to me... But, what the heck, I'm getting old and grumpy. Never mind me! Just the same, I’ll tell you more about ‘nice people behaving not so nicely’ some other time.
Friday 4 July 2003
All's well when it ends well
Everything's done! I'm going home! There's nothing like a little help from the masters to speed up things a little bit. BK, recently being called 'Khun Blues' due to his long presence in Thailand, arrived on site Thursday morning. We had this little meeting with the end user in the morning and after lunch he helped me validating the environment.
Nothig wrong with my installation (which made me very proud and relieved) but still the bloody Dialogic Card wasn't dialing.
Yesterday, we repeated the routine and after fiddling with the board configuration a little more - badabin-badaban - we were able to make the calls. We're done! Now, all I have to do is be available and wait till other pieces of the solution are ready, so we can proceed with UAT (User Acceptance Testing) and move to production.
Good, lah!!!
Nothig wrong with my installation (which made me very proud and relieved) but still the bloody Dialogic Card wasn't dialing.
Yesterday, we repeated the routine and after fiddling with the board configuration a little more - badabin-badaban - we were able to make the calls. We're done! Now, all I have to do is be available and wait till other pieces of the solution are ready, so we can proceed with UAT (User Acceptance Testing) and move to production.
Good, lah!!!
Thursday 3 July 2003
Testing, 1, 2, 3...
My first post using the new PDA! I'm not sure it's going to work as my connection to the desktop application is not yet operational. It's not the first time it stops synchronizing. It happened once before. That time, all I had to do was re-install the software. Well, this time it did not work. Another thing that is bothering me a bit is the fact my Graffiti is not so accurate anymore. I don't know, maybe it's just a matter of getting used to the 'feel' of the screen, which is a lot smoother than the other model. Or maybe I'll have to buy protective screen covers to this model. I don't know...
Wednesday 2 July 2003
About falling in love
"Data from questionnaire studies (Rombouts, 1987) suggest that [falling in love] is triggered by a specific sequence of events, in which the qualities of the love-object are of minor importance. A person is ready to fall in love because of one of a number of reasons - loneliness, sexual need, dissatisfaction, or need or variety. An object then incites interest, again for one of a number of reasons, such as novelty, attractiveness, or mere proximity. Then give the person a moment of promise, a brief response from the object that suggests interest. It may be a confidence; it may be a single glance, such as a young girl may think she received from a pop star. Then give the person a brief lapse of time - anywhere between half an hour or half a day, the self-report suggests - during which fantasies can develop. After that sequence, no more than a single confirmation, real or imagined is needed to precipitate falling in love." -- Nico H. Frijda, University of Amsterdam, The Netherlands in his paper on The Laws of Emotion.
Tuesday 1 July 2003
Home! Finally!
Good Lord! That was an adventure... I'm finally back at the hotel, waiting for my medium rare sirloin steak with black pepper sauce. I'm starving! And oh so tired (what's new?).
I still have to read the documentation on the 'Outbound Solution' and reply to mail messages, but it's ok. At least I can do it in my briefs. And tonight I *AM* going to bed early.
I still have to read the documentation on the 'Outbound Solution' and reply to mail messages, but it's ok. At least I can do it in my briefs. And tonight I *AM* going to bed early.
It's fine. Until it rains...
When in Kuala Lumpur, being Malaysia a Muslin country, you do have to exercise some common sense. Not that it's dangerous or anything alike; It's just that the culture is really different and it's not hard to find oneself in an uncomfortable gaffe. For example, Muslin women are not supposed to have any physical contact with men other than their husbands. So, if you try to shake their hands when you get introduced, you will find yourself in a social gaffe. Since in the business world shaking hands is normal (unless you're in Japan) some Muslin business women are used to it and consider it acceptable. But in any case, wait for them to extend their hands and you will avoid looking silly.
I'm not sure if I mentioned but recently in the local papers, an article was discussing what should constitute 'improper or lewd behaviour'. The question was raised after a young couple was arrested and fined in KL for holding hands in a park. Last Valentine's Day I also read that the police was arresting couples who were making out in cars and forcing them to get married. A Muslin friend, whose sister is married to an Englishman, tells me she - the sister - gets constantly nagged by officials asking for marriage certificates. If she fails to produce them, which she never does, she could be in trouble. Yep. There you go. Cultural differences.
I've been told they have some sort of 'moral enforcement agents' that go around, sometimes in disguise, watching out for bad or inappropriate conduct of members of the Muslin community. They say they are not concerned with foreigners, focusing just in preserving the interest of their own people. But I hear contradictory comments on that.
Regardless all these do's and don’ts, Kuala Lumpur is quite fine... Until it rains! Once it starts raining, the city becomes a chaos and things get really complicated. It was just past 5pm when I started packing my stuff to get back to the hotel. That's when I heard it... Loud and clear. Frightening. Mr Murphy's laughter. "Oh, SHOOT" I said to myself. And before I could do anything else, it was pouring outside. It was damn hot the entire day and it had to rain exactly when I was about to leave, of course.
I had to wait for one hour till the rains subsided. It did not stop, but at least I could get outside and wait for a taxi on the taxi stand. But wait, it's not over yet. I was waiting there for half an hour, already soaked, when the rains started to get strong again. I gave up. Decided I would be better off sitting here and accessing the internet. It's almost 8pm and I am still here, at the bank, typing this just to avoid being bored to death. I guess I should try again. Maybe I am luckier this time.
I'm not sure if I mentioned but recently in the local papers, an article was discussing what should constitute 'improper or lewd behaviour'. The question was raised after a young couple was arrested and fined in KL for holding hands in a park. Last Valentine's Day I also read that the police was arresting couples who were making out in cars and forcing them to get married. A Muslin friend, whose sister is married to an Englishman, tells me she - the sister - gets constantly nagged by officials asking for marriage certificates. If she fails to produce them, which she never does, she could be in trouble. Yep. There you go. Cultural differences.
I've been told they have some sort of 'moral enforcement agents' that go around, sometimes in disguise, watching out for bad or inappropriate conduct of members of the Muslin community. They say they are not concerned with foreigners, focusing just in preserving the interest of their own people. But I hear contradictory comments on that.
Regardless all these do's and don’ts, Kuala Lumpur is quite fine... Until it rains! Once it starts raining, the city becomes a chaos and things get really complicated. It was just past 5pm when I started packing my stuff to get back to the hotel. That's when I heard it... Loud and clear. Frightening. Mr Murphy's laughter. "Oh, SHOOT" I said to myself. And before I could do anything else, it was pouring outside. It was damn hot the entire day and it had to rain exactly when I was about to leave, of course.
I had to wait for one hour till the rains subsided. It did not stop, but at least I could get outside and wait for a taxi on the taxi stand. But wait, it's not over yet. I was waiting there for half an hour, already soaked, when the rains started to get strong again. I gave up. Decided I would be better off sitting here and accessing the internet. It's almost 8pm and I am still here, at the bank, typing this just to avoid being bored to death. I guess I should try again. Maybe I am luckier this time.
Huh? No internet access???
Well, it would be more accurate to say 'no proper internet access'. I do have internet access now, but it's so limited. Remember when we used to hand write our letters and the fastest way to send a document was the fax machine? Remember when internet was a novelty and people did not really count on it for 'serious' things? Remember when you decided you needed an internet service provider for your home? To some, this was not so long ago. Myself, in 1987 I was making international phone calls that would cost a fortune just to browse the net through CompuServ. Somehow I missed the big boom and did not get involved in the 'Dot Com' business. I could be running my own ISP now. But it doesn't really matter...
So, here I am, in Kuala Lumpur (by the way, did I mention it means 'Muddy River'?), with very limited internet access and suffering because of that. Even my newest toy, the Clie PEG-NR80V/G with WiFi, has no use as there are no Wireless Spots around. Sad, sad, sad...
So, here I am, in Kuala Lumpur (by the way, did I mention it means 'Muddy River'?), with very limited internet access and suffering because of that. Even my newest toy, the Clie PEG-NR80V/G with WiFi, has no use as there are no Wireless Spots around. Sad, sad, sad...
Sunday 29 June 2003
Hey, hold on a second!
Remember I mentioned SQ flights could carry 60 people and MH flights 40? Ok, disregard that info. Arvind, one of the guys from the project was probably just trying to make me feel a bit better about not being able to get a flight out of KL last Friday. And I fell for it. I mean, at those hours, tired as I was it made sense. Usually the last row of seats in those planes is somewhere between 60 and 64. What I failed to realize is that is the row number but every row, except from the last two, has nine seats. Gosh, I hate when I'm a slow thinker...
Erm... Nopes!
No. Sorry. My mistake. It was not on time. Nine minutes delayed till doors were finally closed and 17 (!) till we were finally on the air.
On the plane
Monday morning. Early morning, I should say. But I'm not complaining; it was my own choice. I could have taken the flight yesterday but I've been trying to avoid having my weekends taken by the job.
And the breaking news is: SQ102 will be on time! Can you believe that? I can't!
And the breaking news is: SQ102 will be on time! Can you believe that? I can't!
Saturday 28 June 2003
Busy, busy day! I accomplished so much it feels strange knowing it is still Saturday. After I arrived in the morning I worked a bit, putting out fires I did not create. Then, I organized stuff in the house a little, browsed the internet a little, updated my blog with the posts from the trip, prepared and ate a hotdog for lunch, spoke with Val, my Brazilian friend, and went out to look for my newest gadget: the latest Sony Clie model released. Yeesssssss!!! My PDA now has WiFi, babe, WiFi! It's gonna be so much easier to update my blog and check for messages!
After that I just took the MRT to the recently inaugurated station next to my condominium, had dinner at the renovated food court, returned home and watched TV a bit. HBO had 'The Bodyguard' showing. Huh? If I cried in the end of the movie? What kind of question is this? ... Okay, okay, I did. Happy? I cry for nothing anyway.
After that it was Cher's Farewell Concert. Amazing how good she looks despite her age!
Gotta go. I'm not concentrating anymore. Cher is more entertaining. Ha!
After that I just took the MRT to the recently inaugurated station next to my condominium, had dinner at the renovated food court, returned home and watched TV a bit. HBO had 'The Bodyguard' showing. Huh? If I cried in the end of the movie? What kind of question is this? ... Okay, okay, I did. Happy? I cry for nothing anyway.
After that it was Cher's Farewell Concert. Amazing how good she looks despite her age!
Gotta go. I'm not concentrating anymore. Cher is more entertaining. Ha!
Friday 27 June 2003
There was no point in waiting... Available flights were two SQ (Singapore Airlines) and one MH (Malaysian Airlines); SQ can take 60 people; MH takes only 40. And I still had 170 people in front of me, waiting. So I got back to KL last night. Rick and the boys from the project were waiting for me at 'Sentral' station. They picked me up and we went drinking.
After 30 minutes or so looking for a place to park the car, we found a spot.
The first bar we went was packed but nothing much was happening. They were playing 'oldies' and apart from some cute Malay/Chinese girls promoting cigarettes and Carlsberg beers, all others had company. Thirty minutes there and we were bored to death. So we moved to another bar.
The second bar had pool tables and some serious 'hoties' dancing, drinking or just hanging around. I was too tired to even consider approaching anyone - which is not my style anyway - but it was nice watching them doing what they do best: being pretty.
By 23:30 I need bed badly. Hating myself for being a 'party pooper', I told the guys I was sorry but had to leave. I spent the night a Ricky's. Woke up pretty early and here I am, on board of SQ103 to SG (late, as you would expect)...
After 30 minutes or so looking for a place to park the car, we found a spot.
The first bar we went was packed but nothing much was happening. They were playing 'oldies' and apart from some cute Malay/Chinese girls promoting cigarettes and Carlsberg beers, all others had company. Thirty minutes there and we were bored to death. So we moved to another bar.
The second bar had pool tables and some serious 'hoties' dancing, drinking or just hanging around. I was too tired to even consider approaching anyone - which is not my style anyway - but it was nice watching them doing what they do best: being pretty.
By 23:30 I need bed badly. Hating myself for being a 'party pooper', I told the guys I was sorry but had to leave. I spent the night a Ricky's. Woke up pretty early and here I am, on board of SQ103 to SG (late, as you would expect)...
Hmmm... This is interesting. I'm on the 'Tren Ekspres' from KLIA to KL (are you used to all the acronyms yet?). They say it takes exactly 28 minutes to get to 'Sentral' station whereas by car it can take a full hour. Costs only RM 35, roughly $17 Sing dollars; I've been paying RM 120 for the Limo Service... Depending on how easy it is to get a taxi at the Central Station, Rajan, the limo driver, might loose a customer.
And before I finish this post... Have you noticed how Bahasa Malay looks similar to English? A friend told me: get a kid with very bad spelling abilities to write something in English and the result is going to be Malay!
And before I finish this post... Have you noticed how Bahasa Malay looks similar to English? A friend told me: get a kid with very bad spelling abilities to write something in English and the result is going to be Malay!
Waiting... Bored... I should have requested a flight for Saturday morning. Big mistake. One lady who was sitting behind me and also waiting for a free seat in any plane going to Singapore was talking on the phone and saying she had been waiting for 5 hours!!! They are still calling #338, my number is 501! I give up... I'm going back to KL. Will try my luck again tomorrow...
So I get to the airport, get a number for queuing for the Malaysia/Singapore shuttle (#501, 173 people before me - ouch!) and head for a quick bite. What's in the radio? "I wanna be the daylight in your eyes, I wanna be like sunshine, only warmer..." J loved that song. Is God testing my resistance? C'mon, Man! Gimme a break here! Please...
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